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Slowly climbing into May
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 765275" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Hi newstart. I have been reading along. I wonder if who your daughter is trying to kid, is <strong><em>herself.</em></strong></p><p></p><p>My sister who I haven't had a relationship with or seen for many years boasts. I just can't stand that quality. She likes asserting superiority over people. I can't stand that quality either. But the person she is trying to impress is herself, I think. Why else would she do it? (But I am only human. I have a hard time holding onto empathy for her. But I do miss her. She wants nothing to do with me. And I am not allowed to contact her. What a loss to <strong><em>HER</em></strong>.)</p><p></p><p>I think as parents it is very painful for us to accept that our children are frail or vulnerable. I know that is the case for me with my son.</p><p>It is almost preferable to see our children as trying on purpose to hurt and deceive us, rather than to see them as wounded.</p><p></p><p>Clearly, I would be an idiot to deny that our kids are indifferent to hurting us. After all, I and the rest of us here have the bruises and scars from the wounds. Personally, I have bloody gashes. I am not backing away from that, But your daughter's lies don't sound to me to be instrumental and manipulative as much as they seem to try to present her in a better light than may be real. You're implying that too.</p><p></p><p>In your daughter's case, it's sad because it seems she has so many positive qualities and attributes. I recall she is quite beautiful. And very good about making money. And quite intelligent. I remember she is adventurous. And I know she can be loving (sometimes.) I hope I am remembering right. </p><p></p><p>I feel it's quite sad to be unable to face who we are. And I see that quality in my son as well, who is utterly defensive about everything.</p><p></p><p>I guess all I am saying here, is that our situations are utterly heartbreaking. I have a broken heart too.</p><p></p><p>In fact, last night after speaking by phone to my son, I had another "heart attack." I get angina. Really sharp heart pain. Usually, it happens when I am asleep and wakes me up. Last night I was awake. Maybe that is a step up. I don't know.. My heart has been checked out twice,by the cardiologist with all kinds of tests; so I know it's my broken heart.</p><p></p><p>I don't know how to put a picture of a heart. So imagine it right here. Love.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 765275, member: 18958"] Hi newstart. I have been reading along. I wonder if who your daughter is trying to kid, is [B][I]herself.[/I][/B] My sister who I haven't had a relationship with or seen for many years boasts. I just can't stand that quality. She likes asserting superiority over people. I can't stand that quality either. But the person she is trying to impress is herself, I think. Why else would she do it? (But I am only human. I have a hard time holding onto empathy for her. But I do miss her. She wants nothing to do with me. And I am not allowed to contact her. What a loss to [B][I]HER[/I][/B].) I think as parents it is very painful for us to accept that our children are frail or vulnerable. I know that is the case for me with my son. It is almost preferable to see our children as trying on purpose to hurt and deceive us, rather than to see them as wounded. Clearly, I would be an idiot to deny that our kids are indifferent to hurting us. After all, I and the rest of us here have the bruises and scars from the wounds. Personally, I have bloody gashes. I am not backing away from that, But your daughter's lies don't sound to me to be instrumental and manipulative as much as they seem to try to present her in a better light than may be real. You're implying that too. In your daughter's case, it's sad because it seems she has so many positive qualities and attributes. I recall she is quite beautiful. And very good about making money. And quite intelligent. I remember she is adventurous. And I know she can be loving (sometimes.) I hope I am remembering right. I feel it's quite sad to be unable to face who we are. And I see that quality in my son as well, who is utterly defensive about everything. I guess all I am saying here, is that our situations are utterly heartbreaking. I have a broken heart too. In fact, last night after speaking by phone to my son, I had another "heart attack." I get angina. Really sharp heart pain. Usually, it happens when I am asleep and wakes me up. Last night I was awake. Maybe that is a step up. I don't know.. My heart has been checked out twice,by the cardiologist with all kinds of tests; so I know it's my broken heart. I don't know how to put a picture of a heart. So imagine it right here. Love. [/QUOTE]
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