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Message: <blockquote data-quote="WiseChoices" data-source="post: 753618" data-attributes="member: 24254">Hi, Bloodied,What a difficult and trying situation. I think I would consult a therapist for my own emotional support and and guidance and  I would also go have a sit down with a local police officer to see what my responsibilities are and what to look for. In your signature it says that DS has a history of drug abuse and domestic violence . So I would ask myself whether the violence was connected to drug abuse/ alcohol use . Is he violent now at any point? You say you think he is sober, but is he involved in recovery? There is a big difference between being sober and being on recovery. When the addict puts down the drugs, the have eliminated one symptom of how their disease played out . The -ISM of the the disease (of alcoholism or addiction) remains. That's the part where the origins of the disease live: the actual mental illness that includes cognitive distortions (<a href="https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_distortion" target="_blank">Cognitive distortion - Wikipedia</a>) and the self-centeredness , self pity, self delusion , and fear.You can require as a condition of living at home that he attend AA or NA meetings and is involved in a recovery program. As a former heavy drug user, it is crucial for him to deal with and heal the faulty thinking that all addicts engage in whether sober or not. In AA the state of sobriety without recovery is called "dry drunk" . In psychology they call it untreated alcoholism. Does he work? You can also require that as a condition of living at home. Does he pay rent? Is he socially connected or isolated? These are all things you might want to look at. I would also attend Al-Anon meetings for my own support because with a former drug user in the family, the whole family is sick and has been affected by the disease and needs supper and treatment EVEN IF he is not currently using. I would ask point blank whether he is entertaining thoughts of hurting anyone. This is what you do with suicide. We have a tendency to not ask the hard questions because we think it will put ideas in someone's head, but that is actually not the case. If he admits to having thoughts ask whether he has a plan to carry these thoughts out. If he does, you need to contact law enforcement and let them deal with him.  Are there guns in the house? If so, get rid of them. Check his room for weapons. I think that the type of thinking you are describing in your son may have to do with fear, loneliness, and a dissatisfaction with life in general. He needs to move forward into something productive and benefiting others in the community. What can he give rather than what can he get? How can he contribute rather than complaining ? These are things I would throw out in discussion when he talks to you . Rather than addressing the ideology, bring it back to himself "What can you do to make this community a better place?" "How are you making a difference?" Etc He can make a difference by attending recovery meeting to help himself and others, for example.How we view other people (in this case immigrants / racially diverse people etc) is a reflection, a mirror, of how we view ourselves . When I am pushing hard against others, I am not accepting/loving myself. And it also is a reflection of a relationship with a Power greater than ourselves. We all have a higher power whether we see it that way or not. It sounds like these radical ideologies have taken the place of a loving higher power in your son's life.</blockquote>

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