Search results for query: *

I've been thinking lately that with people I meet in the workplace or other casual, temporary relationships I may stop acknowledging that I have a child. It's easy small talk for most-- do you have kids? how many? what are they studying? what do they do? I love my son, obviously. But this...

Thank you so much! The total lack of acknowledgment in society at large deepens my pain. And the way domestic violence agencies are clueless when it comes to violence coming from children.... I just found this doctor-- it's on Amazon in case anyone else who missed it wants to see it. I look...

I think I'm just bit wiser now than I was when I made the promise. And my boundaries get stronger. Today he asked to come over so I could help him look for loans, etc-- I said no. Where I'd still like to improve: He found a credit card he is thinking of applying for to cover the balance--...

KSM, what a smart plan. I think it's a little late for that now- but I wish I would have thought of it before telling him I'd pay. Maybe I will waste the money- that's likely- if he does manage to get started in the class- but I doubt he will even make it that far. He had a full ride with...

I have been pretty firm with boundaries with my son. I'm just honestly not interested in talking to him. He wanted his ss card and birth certificate-- I have put him off every time in the past when he has asked for them because they aren't safe with him and the things he plans to do with them...

My son just a prescription for benzos from a doctor. I am sure he won't be able to handle them. I was shocked. It sounds like your best move here was recognizing the manipulation of saying it's because he misses you. I know how painful it is, but you sound strong.

I'm sorry. I know how hard it is. I know exactly the need to escape your own house, etc etc etc.

COPA- I had read what your wrote about needing to live somewhere that you didn't have to go on the highway, but I didn't know that you used to drive confidently then stopped. Do you know what triggered the switch? An accident? I, too, used to drive. I wasn't a big fan of it though- it always...

....hope the knee recovery is going well. You probably have special needs to consider while you are mending- I understand that it's not an easy surgery. I'd add that into the whole equation. Would it be helpful to have her and the grandchildren around, or would it would be too stressful?

She's at a safe house right now, right? It seems to me like if she's at one, she's in a place that has the resources she and your grandchildren need right now. Does she have a case manager there? One option might be getting involved as a member of her "treatment team"/working with the safe...

Me- 44, Resident of a big city in the Northeast

PASA and WISER- Thank you both. And, yes, I have a long term therapist for myself. That relationship has saved my life, and it is the reason I place my hope in therapy.

LIL and COPA, I identify so much with so much that both of you are saying there. LIL, my ex about bankrupted me too. I didn't file because I just went off the grid for more than seven years and it all passed. My financial recovery is a piece of recovery work that doesn't seem to be taken too...

I feel the need to be in touch with people who can relate to my experiences of parenting. Today is my son's 19th birthday. I gave custody to the state about two and half years ago because I could not control.... what could I not control.... anything? Yes, I admitted I could not control...

I think the things I would have done differently are things that would benefit me-- and that they would trickle down to benefiting my son. Primarily, I would have divorced his father sooooo very much sooner. It took me 13 years of marriage before divorce (the light at the end of the tunnel of...

Splitting- casting people as all-good or all-bad, or a particular person at a particular moment as all-good or all-bad, then casting them some other way the next moment is the defining trait of Borderline (BPD). Intelligence and big-heartedness are also very common. The most well-regarded treatment is...

I just want to add a voice to say that I don't think you did a bad thing by calling the police. I think you took a big step toward breaking the patterns when you did that and that you deserve a lot of credit. Maybe you can reframe it a one of the most difficult, or painful things you have...

Happy birthday, Copa. I relate sooooo very much. You sound in a better place, but I hear so much of me in you that I just want to point out to you (to me): "I feel I cannot undermine his health." That you would not undermining if he chooses to stop medication because you have kicked him...

Thank you for the hope.

Thank you for the glimmer of hope.