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Just wondering what parents of "difficult children" have done with their wills or trusts? 1) Who have you appointed as Trustee to handle your affairs if your child is not a good candidate? (Not asking for personal info, but what type of person in lieu of your kid(s)? 2) How have you modified...

I'm a writer, and need to process stuff to integrate it - so I am going to see if it helps to do so here. I just dropped my grandson off at a new rehab a couple of days ago. I am recovering from his time with me, which was approximately one month. Yesterday, I made a list of all of the...

I survived the last several days - dropped my grandson off at rehab yesterday. There were some very upsetting moments - he was detoxing and often has "psychotic" episodes, where he just jumps up and says he has to leave - prior to that he is sane, logical, putting together a plan to go to rehab...

Today is Friday. On Wednesday night I got a message from a relative that my grandson was not doing well and he messaged me and I asked if he had eaten and he said " no" (only booze - so scary). I went to where he was and brought some food. He was up and about and seemed coherent (I had been...

I find it hard to "not know" what is going on with my grandson. He was very available and present and all of a sudden is not. I become a "detective" - I can be hypervigilent (from childhood) and notice "clues" as to what might be going on. I become very uncomfortable "not knowing." I am just...

Today I did not do much - went shopping for food, did some organization - I feel pretty good, though, but tired. Feel that I can "take it easy." Oh yeah, I ordered some stuff on Amazon (Prime day) . . . stuff I "needed." Ha ha. Tonight I will make burritos and salad and then have a hot tub. I...

Yesterday it was anger, today fear . . . I have many techniques I use to combat fear - EFT, mantras, prayer. I am looking forward to learning more techniques moms/grandmas use on this page. I heard something about a list of things to prepare you for anything and I would like a link to that if...

This thread is for processing . . . I go through many emotions related to my loved one who is alcoholic - a feeling of anger just came up and I thought I would process it here: I was living my life, minding my own business - raising kids, raising you - did everything I could to support you -...

I read a post here about mothers with difficult daughters, and it reminded me of a trait of mine and that is "not remembering how people are: going into denial about them." I went away for the weekend with two of my daughters - one of them has been very abusive to me in the past, but I keep...

I need to do things differently or I am not going to make it. I am a senior - My grandson and other relatives are alcoholics. I have been dealing with the substance abuse rescue/recovery/relapse issue since he was 18 - it has now been several years. He is my most cherished relative (so when I...

If you are and have been dealing with a family member suffering from alcoholism/drug abuse, you become sick from the stress of it all - the using/acting out/yelling/court stuff/crying/homelessness/hospitalizations/jail-time - it is all unbelievable - and yet, most of us go on - work, try to...

My grandson recently relapsed and is staying on his mom's couch until he can get a room somewhere. He got a job in one day - the only problem is that it is low paying AND a 1099 job - which I believe is illegal (he doesn't understand those things yet). This is where I need support. He is doing...

My young adult grandson is an alcoholic. He has been in many treatment programs, sober living environments, etc., etc. I have "helped" a lot - my theory was always "If he's sober, I will help." I thought I was giving him time to grow up, to get strong, etc. (Giving food and shelter, towards that...

How do you do this? If the alcoholic/addict sobers up and makes promises, I always "hope" they will find long-term recovery. If I let go completely and have no contact, then I also detach from active hope (it's still lingering inside of me, never to be extinguished). I am a very curious...