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Substance Abuse
22yo Bipolar Son about to be homeless...again
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 759620" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Hi Csmom and welcome. My son is a lot like yours. He has some of the same problems and similar ways of thinking. Sigh.</p><p></p><p>If our sons wanted a place to live they could live at a sober living home. I think room and board is about $400 where I live. Your son is making all kinds of choices. Choices have consequences. Parents should not have to pay the consequences. They accrue to our sons. A job at Fed-ex for 2 to 4 hours a day sounds like a great start. If your son found that place to stay where he has to leave in a few days, he can find another place. Or go to a sober living house. </p><p></p><p>Life is that simple. If we do this, this can happen. If we don't, it yields another result. Cause and effect. Your son doesn't want to accept this. Nor does my own son. </p><p></p><p>What this means is we have to watch them suffer. I do feel bad about the cats. I feel sad your son is not motivated to protect them. And I feel sad that he will have to suffer when you bring them to the shelter. But it's not your consequence to handle them. It's your son's. I hope you are able to speak to him before you surrender them to the shelter. He needs to know directly and upfront what will happen, I believe. I am so sorry.</p><p></p><p>He will not likely need a paystub if he rents a room in an apartment with other people. There is also airbnb. But he needs a way to pay for that. Often airbnb is much cheaper if rented for a month. But I don't know how he can pay for a month's rent on 2 hours of work a day. But renting a room or sharing a room in a house, he could probably do. Here where I live it could be $200 a month or less. That would be doable. </p><p></p><p>When my son was at the homeless shelter he said that many of the people there were working people or students, even graduate students. When people are motivated, they do what they have to do. Sadly, my son is motivated only to smoke marijuana. We used to stay at a hostel in San Francisco when we were visiting. I remember that working people lived there who could not afford apartments. There are also weekly motels that are cheap. I don't think it's wrong to go over these options with our sons. But it's wrong for them to make us responsible or to yell at us with frustration because we don't take care of them.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 759620, member: 18958"] Hi Csmom and welcome. My son is a lot like yours. He has some of the same problems and similar ways of thinking. Sigh. If our sons wanted a place to live they could live at a sober living home. I think room and board is about $400 where I live. Your son is making all kinds of choices. Choices have consequences. Parents should not have to pay the consequences. They accrue to our sons. A job at Fed-ex for 2 to 4 hours a day sounds like a great start. If your son found that place to stay where he has to leave in a few days, he can find another place. Or go to a sober living house. Life is that simple. If we do this, this can happen. If we don't, it yields another result. Cause and effect. Your son doesn't want to accept this. Nor does my own son. What this means is we have to watch them suffer. I do feel bad about the cats. I feel sad your son is not motivated to protect them. And I feel sad that he will have to suffer when you bring them to the shelter. But it's not your consequence to handle them. It's your son's. I hope you are able to speak to him before you surrender them to the shelter. He needs to know directly and upfront what will happen, I believe. I am so sorry. He will not likely need a paystub if he rents a room in an apartment with other people. There is also airbnb. But he needs a way to pay for that. Often airbnb is much cheaper if rented for a month. But I don't know how he can pay for a month's rent on 2 hours of work a day. But renting a room or sharing a room in a house, he could probably do. Here where I live it could be $200 a month or less. That would be doable. When my son was at the homeless shelter he said that many of the people there were working people or students, even graduate students. When people are motivated, they do what they have to do. Sadly, my son is motivated only to smoke marijuana. We used to stay at a hostel in San Francisco when we were visiting. I remember that working people lived there who could not afford apartments. There are also weekly motels that are cheap. I don't think it's wrong to go over these options with our sons. But it's wrong for them to make us responsible or to yell at us with frustration because we don't take care of them. [/QUOTE]
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