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Family of Origin
Addiction to a toxic person...so weird
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 737803" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Copa, thank you. I would hug you if you were here.</p><p></p><p>It seems as if we are both caught in this sick toxic non relationship with both of us, me included, needing to "win." There is no other reason we do this, but I never thought about how much my mother, way back when, set us both up for this toxic addiction.</p><p></p><p>Why do I play this sick game? Because it is an addiction, a sick one and the same for her. I will not check her nasty posts for long periods of time and I forget about her. Then one day, I am bored and think its over and that I can handle it, so I look, and, like any addict, I am drawn into this ugliness that accomplishes nothing for either her or me</p><p></p><p>You know, like you, I may start going back to AlAnon or even AA, although I never drank. I have this addiction.. In all areas of life I am content and I usually am happy so I dont see a therapist often enough to work this out with one. Its an addiction problem that my mom instilled into both of us. And one person I never want to "win" is my mother, who set up this dynamic.</p><p></p><p>Thank you, thank you, thank you. I am addicted to this game. If I dare even read a posting title I am drinking alcohol again.</p><p>Twelve Step is very helpful to me and they deal with all addiction issues now. Tomorrow I am looking into meeting times. Enough is enough. I deserve to stop ever taking the bait. I dont even CARE what is said anymore. Its just that childhood hook to do a tit for tat. Addiction.</p><p></p><p>Thank you again. I am better than this. You are very brave and I love how you speak up. I needed this.</p><p></p><p>I feel good just knowing I will be taking real steps to stop this addiction. I dont need to try to win. In all seriousness, I already won, at least I have the life I dreamed about and never thought I would have.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 737803, member: 1550"] Copa, thank you. I would hug you if you were here. It seems as if we are both caught in this sick toxic non relationship with both of us, me included, needing to "win." There is no other reason we do this, but I never thought about how much my mother, way back when, set us both up for this toxic addiction. Why do I play this sick game? Because it is an addiction, a sick one and the same for her. I will not check her nasty posts for long periods of time and I forget about her. Then one day, I am bored and think its over and that I can handle it, so I look, and, like any addict, I am drawn into this ugliness that accomplishes nothing for either her or me You know, like you, I may start going back to AlAnon or even AA, although I never drank. I have this addiction.. In all areas of life I am content and I usually am happy so I dont see a therapist often enough to work this out with one. Its an addiction problem that my mom instilled into both of us. And one person I never want to "win" is my mother, who set up this dynamic. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I am addicted to this game. If I dare even read a posting title I am drinking alcohol again. Twelve Step is very helpful to me and they deal with all addiction issues now. Tomorrow I am looking into meeting times. Enough is enough. I deserve to stop ever taking the bait. I dont even CARE what is said anymore. Its just that childhood hook to do a tit for tat. Addiction. Thank you again. I am better than this. You are very brave and I love how you speak up. I needed this. I feel good just knowing I will be taking real steps to stop this addiction. I dont need to try to win. In all seriousness, I already won, at least I have the life I dreamed about and never thought I would have. [/QUOTE]
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Addiction to a toxic person...so weird
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