Al Anon?

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by BusynMember, Apr 28, 2019.

  1. BusynMember

    BusynMember Well-Known Member

    I went to a few meetings when Kay was a teen, but she used dangerous stuff then.

    My question is, would we be taken seriously? I know my daughter no longer uses cocaine and worse and is just a daily pot smoker. Yet she like still acts like an addict, just pot or not. Would we get the help we need or would the people roll their eyes at us because it is just pot?

    Trust me, Kay and Lee can not go a day without weed, at least when they are together which is most of the time. But would people with loved ones who are alcoholics and hard drug users even think we belong there?

    Anyone here going? We are needing to talk and family is not an option due to their extreme reactions one way or the other. We are alone in this.
  2. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    12 step groups are generally not judgmental, if they are, find another group. It's more about YOU then your daughter, a safe place for you to get the support you need. You might try Families Anonymous as well, many parents here have found those groups to be very helpful. I think most 12 step groups you might choose will be supportive for you. Try out an Al Anon Group, perhaps a Families Anonymous group, there's Narc Anon and CoDa as well. Try a couple to see how you feel, like anything else, there are great ones and then there are other kinds. You might also benefit from therapy. You can access therapists in your area at: Find a Therapist or Find a Therapist, Psychologist, Counselor - Psychology Today.
  3. Crayola13

    Crayola13 Active Member

    NA and AA haven't changed their stance on pot or Kratom. However, there are some people who attend the 12 step meetings who use those substances.
  4. BusynMember

    BusynMember Well-Known Member

    I wouldnt be going to AA or NA. I would be going to the group who are NOT taking substances, and need help dealing with loved ones who are addicts. So what AA or NA thinks isn't the issue. Thanks anyway, Crayola.

    Thanks, RE. I do worry that the others will think that pot is not so bad considering what they go through.

    Guess we can just try and see. There is only Al Anon here, no other twelve steps groups near.
  5. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    I have been attending AlAnon for almost two years. It's the only group in our small town for family and friends of people with addiction issues. About half the people who attend has children who abuse alcohol or drugs.

    I can tell you that the information I have gained is useful with just plain old difficult people in general. Addiction or not.

    Give it a try. You don't have to explain what drugs your daughter or sister in law uses. Ksm
  6. BusynMember

    BusynMember Well-Known Member

    Thank you very much. Sadly just what we We will go.
  7. Crayola13

    Crayola13 Active Member

  8. BusynMember

    BusynMember Well-Known Member

    Thank you, Crayola, for clarifying.
  9. LauraH

    LauraH Active Member

    I've been going to a local NarAnon for about a month now. It's been a lifesaver. I've learned that enforcing boundaries and "tough love" don't make me a bad mother. I've learned that there are people in worse situations than mine, and in better, but that I am far from alone in my struggle to maintain some sense of normality in a totally abnormal situation. I've learned better ways to react as well as help others learn as well. I heard this phrase a long time ago "Once an addict, always an addict." There are people in my group whose loved one(s) haven't used in months or years but are still struggling with the fallout of addiction. They would welcome you as warmly if your kids were completely drug free as they would if they were strung out on heroin or crack, or even alcohol or marijuana. Try it out, either NarAon and/or me, you won't regret it. Good luck!