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<blockquote data-quote="elizabrary" data-source="post: 750124" data-attributes="member: 11235"><p>These troubled adult kids love to turn the story around and guilt and shame their parents. I went through it with my daughter too. If you were truly such a horrible parent you wouldn't be on this board worried sick about your daughter. It sounds like she is for sure having some mental health issues and perhaps she is self medicating with some kind of drugs too. If you plan to let her continue living with you I am a huge proponent of writing out an agreement explicitly stating your expectations of her- have a job, take classes, attend counseling, treat family members with respect, ways she will contribute to the household- and have her sign it. This is a one strike and you're out thing, so you have to be prepared to follow through and actually kick her out of the house if she breaks any of the rules. I did it with my daughter and I had to kick her out with her infant daughter, which didn't surprise me but it was terribly upsetting. She is an adult and is responsible for her life and behavior. No matter how much you want her to change, it is up to her. All you can control is yourself and your reactions to her behavior. Good luck. I know how difficult this is.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="elizabrary, post: 750124, member: 11235"] These troubled adult kids love to turn the story around and guilt and shame their parents. I went through it with my daughter too. If you were truly such a horrible parent you wouldn't be on this board worried sick about your daughter. It sounds like she is for sure having some mental health issues and perhaps she is self medicating with some kind of drugs too. If you plan to let her continue living with you I am a huge proponent of writing out an agreement explicitly stating your expectations of her- have a job, take classes, attend counseling, treat family members with respect, ways she will contribute to the household- and have her sign it. This is a one strike and you're out thing, so you have to be prepared to follow through and actually kick her out of the house if she breaks any of the rules. I did it with my daughter and I had to kick her out with her infant daughter, which didn't surprise me but it was terribly upsetting. She is an adult and is responsible for her life and behavior. No matter how much you want her to change, it is up to her. All you can control is yourself and your reactions to her behavior. Good luck. I know how difficult this is. [/QUOTE]
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