SuZir
Well-Known Member
My husband hasn't been himself for some time. It started during the summer. First it came out with him being very irritated with difficult child and that has gotten worse only with some short better times. Lately he has also been irritated with me and our dogs and at times even with easy child, who usually can not do wrong if you ask husband. Yesterday we hit a new low and I'm starting to get fed up with his attitude.
Yesterday we went to church because it was a first advent. mother in law and father in law and other family was also there and so did many friends and neighbours. There was coffee and chatting after the service. difficult child's grades of finals are back and his graduation ceremony is soon. He did extremely well with his finals. He is not going to go to graduation ceremony and will only allow small party with closest people there. mother in law did threaten to boycott the party but now they are coming anyway. During the church coffee mother in law and husband went to 'humble brag'-fest over difficult child's grades. They went on and on what a shame it is that difficult child has social skills worth the snail, when he does so well academically and could do something from himself if he wasn't such a social imbecile. Okay, I did feel like bragging too so I can't hold that against them. And about everyone present also knows about difficult child's social deficits so nothing new there. But it was little embarrassing.
In our way home I teased husband about his bragging and to my surprise he went off on me over everything. Apparently everything with difficult child is my fault. I spoiled him, I didn't let him learn social skills because I protected and guided him too much when he was young. Then I didn't protect him enough and he ended up bullied. And it is my fault I didn't notice that. difficult child has always been more of my responsibility and easy child husband's. Apparently if it had been other they around he would had noticed and done better and difficult child wouldn't be a person he is now, if I would had done better job as a parent. Basically he threw me with every accusation I have been whirling in my mind. Some have some truth, some not that much. But it really hurt to get them thrown into my face by husband.
He spent a night on couch and he was apologetic this morning. I'm still hurt. And worried, this simply is not like him.
And to make my day perfect mother in law called and complained about the weather forecast for the day we have to drive to difficult child's town for party. I guess that too is my fault. And if that wasn't enough difficult child had an other set back in his sport and is bound to feel very bad. And that will likely make him grumpy and obnoxious. So we will most likely have a lovely party. I so feel like getting back to my bed and not waking up before spring when all this crab is hopefully behind us.
Yesterday we went to church because it was a first advent. mother in law and father in law and other family was also there and so did many friends and neighbours. There was coffee and chatting after the service. difficult child's grades of finals are back and his graduation ceremony is soon. He did extremely well with his finals. He is not going to go to graduation ceremony and will only allow small party with closest people there. mother in law did threaten to boycott the party but now they are coming anyway. During the church coffee mother in law and husband went to 'humble brag'-fest over difficult child's grades. They went on and on what a shame it is that difficult child has social skills worth the snail, when he does so well academically and could do something from himself if he wasn't such a social imbecile. Okay, I did feel like bragging too so I can't hold that against them. And about everyone present also knows about difficult child's social deficits so nothing new there. But it was little embarrassing.
In our way home I teased husband about his bragging and to my surprise he went off on me over everything. Apparently everything with difficult child is my fault. I spoiled him, I didn't let him learn social skills because I protected and guided him too much when he was young. Then I didn't protect him enough and he ended up bullied. And it is my fault I didn't notice that. difficult child has always been more of my responsibility and easy child husband's. Apparently if it had been other they around he would had noticed and done better and difficult child wouldn't be a person he is now, if I would had done better job as a parent. Basically he threw me with every accusation I have been whirling in my mind. Some have some truth, some not that much. But it really hurt to get them thrown into my face by husband.
He spent a night on couch and he was apologetic this morning. I'm still hurt. And worried, this simply is not like him.
And to make my day perfect mother in law called and complained about the weather forecast for the day we have to drive to difficult child's town for party. I guess that too is my fault. And if that wasn't enough difficult child had an other set back in his sport and is bound to feel very bad. And that will likely make him grumpy and obnoxious. So we will most likely have a lovely party. I so feel like getting back to my bed and not waking up before spring when all this crab is hopefully behind us.