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General Parenting
Conduct disorder and it’s toll on my family
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<blockquote data-quote="Nandina" data-source="post: 763239" data-attributes="member: 23742"><p>An experience I had with my daughter when she was that age was that she would imitate things she saw on TV and we didn’t even allow violence or anything other than G rated shows (or so we tried).</p><p></p><p>Even some cartoons like Looney Tunes (not sure if that’s still around; she’s 35 now) are not innocent. You wouldn’t believe how violent some of those cartoons can be that we tend to think are harmless! It’s goofy violence, like bonking someone over the head or flippin’ em through the air—I think most people have seen it.</p><p>It’s supposed to be funny. But to a four year old, they just watch it and possibly try to imitate it without knowing it‘s actually inappropriate behavior. (And in my opinion has no place on children’s television.)</p><p></p><p>This actually happened to me when my daughter was about 3 or 4, had just started daycare, and she got in trouble for “bonking” children over the head like you see on cartoons. She had never behaved like that before and I couldn’t figure out where it was coming from because we were so cautious about what we let her watch. Then I found out the daycare was letting them watch Looney Tunes on a regular basis! We didn’t even allow her to watch Looney Tunes because I had already seen the show’s “play“ violence and didn’t like it. To make matters worse, they threatened to kick her out because she was imitating what she was viewing under their care. Oh boy, was I mad.</p><p></p><p>Taffina, I offer this advice: I would keep this child away from any semblance of violence, even the cartoon kind. That means video games, cartoons other than gentle and loving types—no Power Rangers, Ninja Turtles etc. And be careful about TV shows. Even PG shows, in my opinion, are often not appropriate for four year olds.</p><p></p><p>I don’t mean to be an alarmist, but a child that young is <em>very </em>impressionable and if that child is on the autism spectrum, possibly even more so. I have a child on the spectrum (a different child) and he imitated everything he heard and saw as a youngster.</p><p></p><p>I hope you can get the care that this child needs. In my son’s case, there was an early intervention program in our city that was a very good experience for him. It taught him social skills, how to work in groups with other children, and other skills that he would need before entering kindergarten. Maybe your city has one too.</p><p></p><p>And if you don’t feel this child is ready for kindergarten when the time comes, by all means, hold him back. It is much better to have a child prepared for school and mature enough to handle it, especially with the issues you are dealing with. If he goes and he’s not ready, it can be a nightmare for both of you. I’ve been there, believe me. </p><p></p><p>I wish you the best. Hugs, and keep posting, please.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nandina, post: 763239, member: 23742"] An experience I had with my daughter when she was that age was that she would imitate things she saw on TV and we didn’t even allow violence or anything other than G rated shows (or so we tried). Even some cartoons like Looney Tunes (not sure if that’s still around; she’s 35 now) are not innocent. You wouldn’t believe how violent some of those cartoons can be that we tend to think are harmless! It’s goofy violence, like bonking someone over the head or flippin’ em through the air—I think most people have seen it. It’s supposed to be funny. But to a four year old, they just watch it and possibly try to imitate it without knowing it‘s actually inappropriate behavior. (And in my opinion has no place on children’s television.) This actually happened to me when my daughter was about 3 or 4, had just started daycare, and she got in trouble for “bonking” children over the head like you see on cartoons. She had never behaved like that before and I couldn’t figure out where it was coming from because we were so cautious about what we let her watch. Then I found out the daycare was letting them watch Looney Tunes on a regular basis! We didn’t even allow her to watch Looney Tunes because I had already seen the show’s “play“ violence and didn’t like it. To make matters worse, they threatened to kick her out because she was imitating what she was viewing under their care. Oh boy, was I mad. Taffina, I offer this advice: I would keep this child away from any semblance of violence, even the cartoon kind. That means video games, cartoons other than gentle and loving types—no Power Rangers, Ninja Turtles etc. And be careful about TV shows. Even PG shows, in my opinion, are often not appropriate for four year olds. I don’t mean to be an alarmist, but a child that young is [I]very [/I]impressionable[I] [/I]and if that child is on the autism spectrum, possibly even more so. I have a child on the spectrum (a different child) and he imitated everything he heard and saw as a youngster. I hope you can get the care that this child needs. In my son’s case, there was an early intervention program in our city that was a very good experience for him. It taught him social skills, how to work in groups with other children, and other skills that he would need before entering kindergarten. Maybe your city has one too. And if you don’t feel this child is ready for kindergarten when the time comes, by all means, hold him back. It is much better to have a child prepared for school and mature enough to handle it, especially with the issues you are dealing with. If he goes and he’s not ready, it can be a nightmare for both of you. I’ve been there, believe me. I wish you the best. Hugs, and keep posting, please. [/QUOTE]
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