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Substance Abuse
Daughter spiraling out of control
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<blockquote data-quote="Albatross" data-source="post: 697448" data-attributes="member: 17720"><p>Welcome, Boodles. Sorry you had to find us. It sounds like you have really been through it with your daughter.</p><p></p><p>My son's substance of choice is also alcohol. He too would leave every time we tried to get him into treatment. However, he was 18 by then, so there was not much we could do, other than kick him out.</p><p></p><p>Your daughter is still a minor, so strictly speaking I guess you *could* (theoretically) force her to enter rehab, in the hopes that drying out and getting her away from her bad influences for a bit might make something click. Do you think it would do any good?</p><p></p><p>I generally believe that rehab is pretty useless if someone isn't ready to hear the message.</p><p></p><p>I can also see how forcing her to enter treatment might add some resentment and rebellion that could make things even worse.</p><p></p><p>But I do look back and wonder sometimes if things would have been different, had I foreseen how bad his drinking would get and forced treatment when I still could have.</p><p></p><p>Then I think about my son's ex-girlfriend, and how her parents handled it when they found out she had been drinking. They were not kidding around -- residential rehab followed by mandatory counseling and AA attendance, transfer out of public school and into a strict Christian setting, and sending her on a missionary trip/boot camp for the summer. Sadly, the outcome has been about the same, despite the very different ways they were handled.</p><p></p><p>I guess it all goes back to trying to force it before they are ready.</p><p></p><p>But 17 is so young. You only have a few more months until you will have no control over her at all...</p><p></p><p>Sadly, we do know how a child with an alcohol or drug addiction can wreak absolute havoc in a family. It truly is a family disease. I hope you and your husband do seek some way of getting a grip on your pain, whether it be through Al-Anon, counseling, or trusted friends you can talk to. Keep posting. It helps.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Albatross, post: 697448, member: 17720"] Welcome, Boodles. Sorry you had to find us. It sounds like you have really been through it with your daughter. My son's substance of choice is also alcohol. He too would leave every time we tried to get him into treatment. However, he was 18 by then, so there was not much we could do, other than kick him out. Your daughter is still a minor, so strictly speaking I guess you *could* (theoretically) force her to enter rehab, in the hopes that drying out and getting her away from her bad influences for a bit might make something click. Do you think it would do any good? I generally believe that rehab is pretty useless if someone isn't ready to hear the message. I can also see how forcing her to enter treatment might add some resentment and rebellion that could make things even worse. But I do look back and wonder sometimes if things would have been different, had I foreseen how bad his drinking would get and forced treatment when I still could have. Then I think about my son's ex-girlfriend, and how her parents handled it when they found out she had been drinking. They were not kidding around -- residential rehab followed by mandatory counseling and AA attendance, transfer out of public school and into a strict Christian setting, and sending her on a missionary trip/boot camp for the summer. Sadly, the outcome has been about the same, despite the very different ways they were handled. I guess it all goes back to trying to force it before they are ready. But 17 is so young. You only have a few more months until you will have no control over her at all... Sadly, we do know how a child with an alcohol or drug addiction can wreak absolute havoc in a family. It truly is a family disease. I hope you and your husband do seek some way of getting a grip on your pain, whether it be through Al-Anon, counseling, or trusted friends you can talk to. Keep posting. It helps. [/QUOTE]
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