Emotional intoxication

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Enmeshedmom, Jan 12, 2018.

  1. Enmeshedmom

    Enmeshedmom Member

    Emotional intoxication occurs when personal conflicts and emotions directly affect our physical and psychological well being. Emotional intoxication manifests in symptoms like irritability, depression, emotional instability, and fatigue.
    Anyone ever hear this term? I heard it yesterday on a recovery podcast and googled it and it describes me to a T. When I allow myself to go there (it happens a lot) it is like I am drunk on negative emotions. I pass out by 8pm and wake up feeling like I have a hangover complete with feelings of guilt, anger and nausea. I think growing up with alcoholics has made me addicted to feeling bad.
    I have started attending al Anon and co-dependents anonymous and hope this is path to healing my heart. My son starts a new job today and he also started playing bass guitar for a local singer so things seem to be going good for him righ now. I am keeping my fingers crossed that things will just keep getting better for him but I’m trying not to have expectations.
     
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  2. Tanya M

    Tanya M Living with an attitude of gratitude Staff Member

    I've never heard that term but I can see validity in it.

    The human body and brain are amazing things.

    We can re-train our brains. I went through a period of self doubt, always thinking "I will never be good enough" "What is wrong with me" All of these negative feelings/emotions took a toll on me, mentally and physically. I started putting sticky notes on my bathroom mirror with positive affirmations. "I am good enough" "I am kind and loving" "I am smart" "I can succeed"
    At first it was kind of weird but I would read these sayings out loud. Then it progressed, as I would go through my days if those negative thoughts started coming into my mind I was quick to recognize them and would counter it with a positive thought.
    I was able to re-train my brain.

    It's very easy to slip into the negative darkness but the good thing is we can turn it around.

    This is a good thing! It will help to heal not only your heart but your mind as well.

    Glad to hear your son is doing good. You are wise to keep your expectations in check.
     
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  3. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I tend to over think about many things although it has been years since I worry too much about my kids. But this can apply to anything.

    Tanya, love your methods. I use meditation. I alsostarted to realize that I am worthwhile and lovable from being around positive people. I had to focus on positivity!! l also I realize we can't change another, even a grown child.
     
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    Last edited: Jan 12, 2018
  4. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I also believe we can re-train our brains.

    My understanding of it is that when we're in those highly emotional situations, we literally create new neuro pathways in our brains. So, that when we are again confronted with the fear or whatever intense emotional response we have, we dig that neuro pathway a bit deeper until it is one of the only paths the brain is taking. However, if we can step back, observe what we're doing, become conscious of it, we can choose a different response thereby creating yet another new neuro pathway in the brain which might offer peace or calm, instead of worry and fear.

    I've done this with being aware/mindful, meditation, getting out the door to hike if I'm taken over with negative emotions (statistics show that even a mere 11 minute walk has the potential to shift our brains). Changing my diet because sugar/dairy and other food items create inflammation which impacts the gut which then impacts the brain.

    We can shift our negative responses to life. However, it takes a commitment, it doesn't just happen. We have to choose to make the changes, to be aware of how we fall into these traps and pull our own selves out. We have to be willing to change and do the work change demands.

    As the saying goes, "Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional." We have more power than many of us believe we do. We have the power to shift our beliefs, our responses, our perceptions.

    I was reading an article which stated that our beliefs are simply "opinions" based on our history. It's easy to think our beliefs are THE TRUTH....which then keeps us stuck defending that truth.....if we can step back from all of that relentless mind chatter long enough to create an open space, it's a lot easier to then be available to new data. Meditation is probably the biggest support in opening that space because it stops the mind chatter long enough for new, healthier thoughts to emerge.

    Like Tanya and SWOT have so successfully shown, we can change, we can have lives which reflect our peacefulness, our joy, our sense of authenticity and pleasure.....however, we have to be willing to let go of what isn't working and what is making us suffer and open to a new awareness. Not always easy, but absolutely doable.
     
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  5. Tanya M

    Tanya M Living with an attitude of gratitude Staff Member

    SWOT, I think this is one of the best things we can do for ourselves it to align with positive people.

    Just because someone is "family" does not mean we have to subject ourselves to their negative ways. I think this is where so many can get tripped up thinking because they are "family" we just have to put up with it.
    Negative is negative whether son, daughter, sister, brother, mother, father, aunt, uncle, and so on.

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  6. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Re, did you get that part about our opinions based on our history from Tolle?? I listened to one just like this on YouTube this morning! It was so right on!
     
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  7. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    I am so very happy you are working on helping yourself. This is such an important step in our recovery.
    I have never heard of this term and yes it describes what many of us suffer from to a T!

    If you happen to have a link to the podcast and can share it that would be great.

    Be kind and good to yourself.
     
  8. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    SWOT, it may have been Tolle.....I just read so much, I'm not entirely sure, but you may indeed be correct! I am a fan of his too.
     
  9. Enmeshedmom

    Enmeshedmom Member

    The podcast can be found at therecoveryshow.com . I listen in my car whenever I’m alone and I really enjoy it.
     
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  10. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    Thank you