It’s been awhile....

ColleenB

Active Member
I haven’t been here In over a year. Not sure why I decided to check in, maybe because I know I could have used some hope those long years when my son was using and on a one way path to self destruction... one I often joined him on.

We were not perfect parents, but we gave our boys every opportunity and supported them both. Our oldest as some may remember had a rough few years of using and selling. It almost killed us emotionally. We were zombies going through life waiting for him to die or worse.....

Fall 2017 he had an intervention and by some miracle his friends showed him he was loved and valued. He made changes. Slow at first... he found an art program he loves, he got sober, stopped using hard drugs. He also started dating a girl who was healthy and kind.

I can’t believe we lived that life for four years now. He is the son I remember but also more... he has passion again, he cares about his family and he seems happy.

His recovery was not perfect at all! Crashed car, almost losing his art school placement... but these taught him to want a new life.

I just want to give hope to those still suffering. I was you. My son was your son.

Hang on....
 

RN0441

100% better than I was but not at 100% yet
Colleen

So happy you made it to the other side of this horrible journey.

I hope your son continues to do well!
 

Kalahou

Well-Known Member
Thank you for returning to share this success, Colleen. I remember your postings very well and the intervention. I'm thankful your situation resolved itself well, and that your son and your family are moving on. Take care and thanks for sharing.
 

tryingtobestrong

Active Member
I needed to read this tonight. Thank you for giving me hope when it really feels like there isn't any. I believe my son has relapsed again. If my feelings are correct, it is again at the 6 week mark. Meaning he made it sober for about 6 weeks and well I really feel he has started drinking again.
We send texts and no replies.. So, I stopped trying to make contact. Not sure if that is right or wrong but I am told we need to take care of ourselves. The roller coaster of the past 7+ years is exhausting. We have done all we can and now just sit back and wait. He was told that is he doesn't stay sober he will most likely die of alcoholism. Since we live across the country and he doesn't answer texts or return calls, all we can do is pray. Pray that he soon lets God into his life, pray that he makes connections with others in recovery, pray God sends someone into his life to take his hand. We are scared, so very scared.
We don't understand. He has caused so much damage to relationships, his finances, his life and still won't follow recommendations from those in recovery or in the treatment programs.
We are at a loss. We have done all we can do.
I hope one day I will be able to post that he is back to being our son and that he cares about his family.
Thank you for giving me hope. I really did need to read this tonight.
 

Copabanana

Well-Known Member
Dear Colleen

How kind of you to return and update us on your story which I remember well. As I recall you are a guidance counselor and this was particularly hard to deal with problems in your own family. I remember son at college, coming home, the challenges for your younger, and your son's insistence that he needed the art college. You and your husband stood by him every step of the way.

How wonderful that he is thriving and that he has returned to himself, is open to life, and to wanting better and more. How great for you.

Take care.
 

RN0441

100% better than I was but not at 100% yet
I needed to read this tonight. Thank you for giving me hope when it really feels like there isn't any. I believe my son has relapsed again. If my feelings are correct, it is again at the 6 week mark. Meaning he made it sober for about 6 weeks and well I really feel he has started drinking again.
We send texts and no replies.. So, I stopped trying to make contact. Not sure if that is right or wrong but I am told we need to take care of ourselves. The roller coaster of the past 7+ years is exhausting. We have done all we can and now just sit back and wait. He was told that is he doesn't stay sober he will most likely die of alcoholism. Since we live across the country and he doesn't answer texts or return calls, all we can do is pray. Pray that he soon lets God into his life, pray that he makes connections with others in recovery, pray God sends someone into his life to take his hand. We are scared, so very scared.
We don't understand. He has caused so much damage to relationships, his finances, his life and still won't follow recommendations from those in recovery or in the treatment programs.
We are at a loss. We have done all we can do.
I hope one day I will be able to post that he is back to being our son and that he cares about his family.
Thank you for giving me hope. I really did need to read this tonight.

I just read a book that my coworker recommended - Save Me From Myself - by Brian Welch who is a former member of the band Korn. I never liked their music - VERY hard rock but he got sober by becoming a Christian. Whether spirituality is what your son needs or something else, it is NOT a straight road. He continued to use for some time before he gave it up totally. So everyone's journey is different. I don't think it's ever "once and done".
 
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