Just had to share...

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Lil, Jan 6, 2016.

  1. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    I know I haven't been on here much, but that's because things have been pretty good and I'm still playing catch-up from vacation. Our son and his girlfriend have been doing okay, paying their own way for the most part. I have bought some groceries and such and some bus passes. Sadly, SHE is still without a job and there's only so much his part-time (20 to 30 hours a week) can do.

    Today I did run some $$ to him, just a little, so he can buy lunch the next few days. He gets paid Monday. I asked him if there was anything I could do to help with girlfriend with the job search.

    He said, "I told her she should call the places where she has applications in and she just says, 'It won't do any good. If they want me they'll call me.' I keep telling her, 'No, they want people who want to work and how you show them you want to work is by calling them!'"

    Oh. My. God.

    That is EXACTLY what we told him a THOUSAND TIMES! Apparently she isn't listening to him any better than he listened to us. Which stinks, because that attitude will get them evicted. She HAS to find work.

    But, this was too good not to share.
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  2. ForeverSpring

    ForeverSpring Well-Known Member

    Ah, sweet, sweet Lil. You know you can't save your son and you can't make this girl grow up either.She is old enough to look for jobs herself if she really wants to work. Bet she's not all that anxious to work. There are placement agencies too, but it's up to her to go and fill out the forms and see a work counselor.

    I'm glad things are going pretty well. You deserve some peaceful times ;)
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  3. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    Oh I know, I was just thinking I could give her pointers, buy a newspaper, etc., etc. Little hands, not big ones. It's on her to find work and I see her making as little effort as my son used to make.

    I just found my son regurgitating my words back beyond funny.
  4. ForeverSpring

    ForeverSpring Well-Known Member

    It is funny :youreright:
  5. A dad

    A dad Active Member

    I do not know about that just saying from experience that its not very well received if you call and ask if they got you application or better ask why was I not called. Lets say for it can make people mad who am I kidding its very very annoying.
    But if you are calling for a job announcement yeah that is no problem. But not what I mentioned above just but from my experience.
  6. in a daze

    in a daze Well-Known Member

    This is so good! I think everything is starting to sink in. He's internalizing what you have taught him.
  7. PennyFromTheBlock

    PennyFromTheBlock Active Member

    My son does this- will say something- BE LOGICAL - and sometimes I truly renders me SPEECHLESS! They listen to us more than we think- and sometimes I believe (at least with my son) when he sees behavior that is JUST LIKE HIS he turns and speaks like I have talked to him- now if only I could get him to PRACTICE what he now will PREACH, life would be good!

    I hope she gets it together- idle time leads to trouble.
  8. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    Really? That's surprising. Around here they pretty much expect you to ask to speak to the hiring manager and at least check to see if they received the application, especially since it's all done on-line. I don't mean call and bug them, and certainly not ask why they didn't call you, but if you call and make sure it was received electronically, it shows initiative. There is one place, Baskin Robbins, who only does paper applications and they actually say on them, "Calling to inquire about a position will void your application." I find that quite odd. If I were an employer, I'd want the guy who cared enough to stop in or at least call. That guy actually wants a job.

    Jabber's job is teaching inmates job hunting skills and that's part of what he teaches.
  9. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    Well, it is really annoying, when you have that open position in the newspaper and you get 250 applications and then 210 of them call and try to come up with something to 'ask' just to show they are really interested. Like you didn't have actual work to do instead of listening them to ramble ;)

    When you have call number 31 and it is not even lunch yet (and you are really behind on your own work), it really annoys to listen and answer and notice that only reason person call to inquire more was, because it has been taught to them, that one should call and inquire more information even when they actually do not have anything to ask.

    /rant I just happened to be a person they could call to inquire more for few open positions on my old job last fall. And at the same time I was crazy busy with actual work. And to make it worse, many of the calls were from the applicants who weren't even qualified. And positions were such that unqualified applications can even be looked at for temporary bases, if not even one qualified applicant applies. And still I think I had at least 50 calls per position from people 'almost' having their Masters on the field and graduating next then and then. And these people have to know the rules concerning these positions.
  10. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    I find that very interesting.

    Would it be improper then, to simply call and make sure your electronic application was received?

    I'd be afraid that a glitch happened and they didn't get it?
  11. AppleCori

    AppleCori Well-Known Member

    Most employers for entry-level jobs around here, and where my older kids worked, were very happy to have an applicant call to enquire. Shows initiative. I don't think they get tons of apps. so maybe its different here in the US. My kids almost always got the job.
  12. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    In my (former) workplace case applications were received by email and of course if one wants to be sure they can ask return receipt. And most automatic systems I have seen do send a confirmation email that the application has been received. If not it is okay to call to front desk and ask, but then again, you ionly get to know that your application is received, the people making the decision are not likely to find out you called. The number given in job adverts around here isn't really for that type of calls.

    This of course can be cultural difference, and in our case we were hiring professionals, so we of course assume they would actually want a job and not just put in the application to please their mom (or employment officials) ;) But around here the contact number given in the newspaper ad is usually not of a clerk or mostly even HR, but the supervisor of the person being hired. And then you are not actually making very positive impression, if you call for naught.

    Of course it would be different if there would be less applications, and less calls, but when it is the position that will have lots of applications, you are likely to find yourself to talk with rather irate person, if you are 20th caller of a day, don't have any actual question to ask, and the person answering is actually busy with other things.

    Still many places teaching how to job search use (American) material, that mentions that one should call, just to show initiative. Old times it worked also here better, but because all the organisations have been slimmed to the max, numbers given in ads are not any more for people who would actually have time to take those 'show initiative'-calls. And in current economy there are always lots of people applying, so it also means lots of people calling.
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    Last edited: Jan 7, 2016
  13. AppleCori

    AppleCori Well-Known Member

    We are talking entry-level, low skilled positions.

    My X was an engineer, and he wouldn't think of calling to enquire about a position he applied for. It just isn't done, and would most likely disqualify you as someone who doesn't know proper protocol.


    Does this girl have a low self-esteem? Sounds like she might be unsure of herself or something.

    Or maybe jus shy?

    I would give her a pep talk if she seems to need it.
  14. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    Yes, it is different for that in many cases. Not all, though, if the company tends to get lots of applications. But then they are likely to be very straight about not wanting calls, like that one company Lil mentioned.

    I was going off the tangent a bit and more answering to the discussion Lil and a Dad were having than referring to original situation. Sorry!
  15. AppleCori

    AppleCori Well-Known Member

    Oh, sorry, Suzir.

    I realized what you meant.

    I don't want to offend, just did want to make the point that the young lady has a better shot if she plays the odds and calls rather than sit back and wait for them to call her.

    For entry-level, low skilled jobs like restaurant work, fast food, etc. they would like to see that the applicant really wants the job and not just going through the motions to collect unemployment or to get mom off their back.
  16. A dad

    A dad Active Member

    Well it depends in manufacturing jobs that are quite a lot where I live you get hundreds of applications each day. Well is annoying you already have a lot to select from and yes its entry position as long as you finished middle school you can be hired but there is still a desire to get the best candidates for the job.
    Since you have to train them you have to reduce the number of people who can not complete the training so you do not waste resources and to do that you call for a interview the ones that seem capable of passing the training to see if they really can.
    Its a lot of work and its annoying if you get calls from potential candidates. The sad thing is I did not had to go trough such a screening process in my first job I went there and asked if they need more help at the factory and got hired. True a lot of people did not actually worked but hey you got a job way faster.
  17. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    Our state just re-instated work requirements for food stamps too. So if you are an adult and have no kids and aren't working, you get 3 months worth, period. Then you have to be working at least part-time or prove you are looking (I think - not sure that's enough) or they drop you. If they have to prove applications, then a lot more people may apply who don't really want the job.

    I think she's 18 and hasn't really worked much. A job at McDonalds, one at a deli where she pretty much just fried bacon and a week or so at a factory and she's quit them all. I think she does need a pep talk. I'm hoping that she can get a fire lit under her.

    I keep thinking that she may be, even unconsciously, thinking that he should support her for a while. Heaven knows she supported him there for a while...he owes her a bunch of money. But, while I would understand that thinking, she's going to find herself out on the street too. I hope I'm wrong there and if that plays into it it's not intentional.
  18. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Lil - Here in Canada? You do NOT call, and especially not on entry-level positions. They get literally thousands of applications, and to end up with even a few hundred calls overwhelms the HR department and/or reception. Most companies have an auto-response mechanism for receiving applications on-line, and you should get a confirmation email back for each application submitted.

    Want to show initiative? Show up in person, with resume in hand, and ask if they are hiring.
  19. A dad

    A dad Active Member

    Its incredible how the job culture to put it like that differs from country to country. I guess it depends on the country how strong is the economy how big is the population many factors. The best thing is to do what should be done in the place you live. It seem in the place where the young couple live calling is okay and encouraged.
  20. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    Wow - I guess it really does differ everywhere. Down here, for entry level jobs like grocery stores, restaurants, etc - they do like that you call. I had one grocery store manager that told me flat out to have my son apply and then to have him come to the store a few times a week to bug him about it. He said that way he remembers him and knows he wants the job. Of course my son didn't do that (he has a whole heap of laziness in him but I am trying to stay off his back until he graduates in May - once he graduates, he needs a full time job - no excuses since he doesn't want to go to college).
    M called to inquire about an application she put in at a chicken plant and they were horribly rude to her on the phone for calling. But Randstad LOVED that she was so enthusiastic about the job she has now that she was hired despite her background and is doing very well!
    Hmmm...no right way I guess...