Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Just help me understand
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 739452" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Hi Penny I remember you. I am glad you are back. I have been posting over three years. I post almost every day, usually a number of posts. Only in the past month and a half have I "gotten it" to the extent that I can act in my own behalf, and indirectly in behalf of my son. And still, even now, I am off and on drowning in heartbreak. I tell you this because it IS NOT YOU. This is hard.</p><p></p><p>Today. I was thinking today about a woman I worked with years ago, a medical doctor. An extremely capable and wonderful person. A very devout woman. Her husband was a physician too. They had one child. And they adored him. As an adult he became involved in sex addictions which were absolutely contrary to the belief system of his parents. He betrayed his parents financially. We would speak, she and I, about her heartbreak. Once she confessed she had wanted to shoot herself with the shotgun she had.</p><p></p><p>She did not blame herself. But she was furious at her son, and while she did not disown him, she disinherited him. She was able to work through her heartbreak but her heart was broken nonetheless.</p><p></p><p>I tell you this because we as single parents, tend to take the fall ourselves. But there are millions and millions of two parent families whose kids go off the deep end. It happens. There are so many variables involved now, in our times. Actually, this was always the case. I read the bible. I am struck by how much trouble people have with their kids, and how so many children in the children in the bible veer off course, and create their own stories. Now people differ about how they view the bible. But my point here is this is the human condition.</p><p></p><p>Attacking yourself, ourselves never, ever helps. It only makes things worse. We cannot afford to do that.</p><p></p><p>What I suggest is to begin posting regularly and work this through. It is not about one mother needing more than the other. We are all of us in this together supporting each other. I get more help posting on other people's threads than I do asking for advice. I get clarity about myself, and I find my voice. This takes time. There is no other way that I have found to do this. There are other ways. But this is what has worked for me.</p><p></p><p>Take care and keep posting. </p><p> </p><p>PS We have no control and no responsibility in another adult's life except to provide some kinds of support (encouragement, love and guidance, etc.) if they want it and they are using it to help themselves.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 739452, member: 18958"] Hi Penny I remember you. I am glad you are back. I have been posting over three years. I post almost every day, usually a number of posts. Only in the past month and a half have I "gotten it" to the extent that I can act in my own behalf, and indirectly in behalf of my son. And still, even now, I am off and on drowning in heartbreak. I tell you this because it IS NOT YOU. This is hard. Today. I was thinking today about a woman I worked with years ago, a medical doctor. An extremely capable and wonderful person. A very devout woman. Her husband was a physician too. They had one child. And they adored him. As an adult he became involved in sex addictions which were absolutely contrary to the belief system of his parents. He betrayed his parents financially. We would speak, she and I, about her heartbreak. Once she confessed she had wanted to shoot herself with the shotgun she had. She did not blame herself. But she was furious at her son, and while she did not disown him, she disinherited him. She was able to work through her heartbreak but her heart was broken nonetheless. I tell you this because we as single parents, tend to take the fall ourselves. But there are millions and millions of two parent families whose kids go off the deep end. It happens. There are so many variables involved now, in our times. Actually, this was always the case. I read the bible. I am struck by how much trouble people have with their kids, and how so many children in the children in the bible veer off course, and create their own stories. Now people differ about how they view the bible. But my point here is this is the human condition. Attacking yourself, ourselves never, ever helps. It only makes things worse. We cannot afford to do that. What I suggest is to begin posting regularly and work this through. It is not about one mother needing more than the other. We are all of us in this together supporting each other. I get more help posting on other people's threads than I do asking for advice. I get clarity about myself, and I find my voice. This takes time. There is no other way that I have found to do this. There are other ways. But this is what has worked for me. Take care and keep posting. PS We have no control and no responsibility in another adult's life except to provide some kinds of support (encouragement, love and guidance, etc.) if they want it and they are using it to help themselves. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Just help me understand
Top