My husband and I just said no to our only daughter. She was pleading for $1200 to pay back child support for a toddler who has been in foster care for a year while she did rehab and was supposed to get a job, see a psychiatrist. She has done neither. Now she says she will go to jail if she doesn’t pay. And of course our refusal will “ruin her life and all that she has worked for.” She is 29 and has cost us thousands in stolen items, ruined cars, recovery houses where she wouldn’t stay, “start up” rent, and on and on until we belatedly reached the end of our rope.
We have said no several times in the past year to other requests- living here (she is not allowed here anymore), borrowing a car, cash. But this one feels worse because supposedly the outcome is jail. We have no idea of course if that is the true situation. I am hoping they will help her with a debt relief program or something. I am hoping they will let her off and the scare will force her to get a job. I am hoping that if she does go to jail, that she’s in some kind of work release program that helps her to continue working when she gets out. I am hoping that this is some kind of turning point for the better.
But I am so afraid to hear what tomorrow brings. And feel guilty that despite all this trauma, my husband and I have a good life and are doing our best to move on and remain “detached with love.”
Any support will be greatly appreciated. Just can’t lay this on my friends. They just don’t know what to say.
We have said no several times in the past year to other requests- living here (she is not allowed here anymore), borrowing a car, cash. But this one feels worse because supposedly the outcome is jail. We have no idea of course if that is the true situation. I am hoping they will help her with a debt relief program or something. I am hoping they will let her off and the scare will force her to get a job. I am hoping that if she does go to jail, that she’s in some kind of work release program that helps her to continue working when she gets out. I am hoping that this is some kind of turning point for the better.
But I am so afraid to hear what tomorrow brings. And feel guilty that despite all this trauma, my husband and I have a good life and are doing our best to move on and remain “detached with love.”
Any support will be greatly appreciated. Just can’t lay this on my friends. They just don’t know what to say.