My 18 y/o left house with-out any warning after using my debit card

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Amy32750, May 12, 2018.

  1. Amy32750

    Amy32750 New Member

    Hello - this is my first post.
    I am hoping I am not the first person with a situation like this.

    My 18 y/o daughter, who never gave me ANY problems during her young teen years, has been stealing my debit card and purchasing item to sell. I thought I was hacked. She would go to our mail box to retrieve the new card, and repeat process.

    She doesn't drive and i would drop off and pick her off at the mall (she claimed to work there, but found out that was untrue), on the 4/27 after I dropped her off, she called me from the airport. WHAT????? And she claimed she was off to a work conference to VA. Contacted my bank, since I thought I was hacked, and she charged airfare to Hartford, CT. and an airbnb stay in MASS. I was totally shocked because she really didn't have any friends in our area. Social Anxiety.

    She replied to textx first week, and replied to emails this week, now just deletes them. I know this cuz she used my laptop and saved the PW.

    From what I read on her emails, she is involved with some adult. who splits his time from VT to the town she is in in MA.
    My heart is so broke.
     
  2. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    You are definitely not the first in this situation. Very recently another members 18 year old withdrew thousands from his father's bank account. I recall vividly a slightly older child stole more than 20k from her mother to buy designer clothes and purses.

    No. You are not alone.

    There are things that must be faced and decided. The pain must wait.

    Will you involve the police? This is not a simple decision. It may not immediately be clear what is in her/your interest.

    She is an adult.

    Are you in contact with her? Are drugs involved? Who is the person she is involved with and what is their role in this?

    I am very sorry. I hope you keep posting. It helps.

    It is as if she had a secret life. Or somebody is putting real pressure on her/or manipulating/preying on her.

    What are your thoughts about how you will respond?
     
  3. Amy32750

    Amy32750 New Member

    No drugs, as far as I know. She has issues with her nose and had minor surgury, she can't swallow pills, and does not like injections.

    i am considering pressing charges. Weighing out all the options.
    She was communicating with me, until this afternoon. She seems MAD about something.

    Her teens years were a joy. Good grades, no disrepect, until NOW. Must have met this person online because he lives in MASS and works in VT. He claims to be a farmer.

    Hass anyone pressed charges? Would love to hear their story.
     
  4. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    Is she still able to charge things on your credit card? Is she communicating with you at all?

    Are you paying off these debts? I am so sorry you are going thru this.

    Ksm
     
  5. Triedntrue

    Triedntrue Active Member

    First i would change my accounts so she cant get access at all. If she doesn't have a job and you cut off funds it might make her realize how hard it can be out there.
     
  6. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    Welcome Amy, I am sorry for your troubles. I will add a different spin to this. Pressing charges may or may not help you find your daughter. In this day and age there is all kinds of stuff going on out there.
    My thoughts exactly. If pressing charges is not an option, maybe file a missing persons report?
    I would definitely do this to protect your funds as well as your personal identity.
    I hope you are able to find your daughter and straighten this out.
    (((HUGS)))
    Leafy