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My baby girl, a psychopath?
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 726073" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Just because you don't or haven't seen him abuse her doesn't mean he hasnt. Please....ask her. Let her know it is all right to tell you. Nothing is worse than finding out after you could have stopped the duration. Most abused kids don't tell...they are afraid. Sexally abused kids have no outward signs. Many DO act out in anger though. This could all be one issue not two.</p><p></p><p>You want to know even the worst so you can understand her to help her change and go to court to remove the threat, if needed. I never saw the boy act sexual at all to anyone but he was doing it. When I asked my littles, at first they denied it. HE admitted it or I may never have known and would not have gotten them help for the abuse.</p><p></p><p>A six month wait is hard. I had to wait a year for my autistic son. It was hard but the fantastic result was better than a less skilled professional. He is 24 now and on his own, kind, working doing great. He got lots of help along the way.</p><p></p><p>None of us are anything but other parents sharing what we know. This behavior you sadly see is out of your field of knowledge. A good psychiatrist needs to diagnose her and he will refer her to a psychologist who will help, but also definitely explore possible abuse of all kinds by father. And find out the extent of what she has done too. Nobody can help her at all with limited knowledge.</p><p></p><p>I am sorry. I know you want us to tell you that you can do something and she will change. None of us can tell you that with honesty. We and even you don't know the whole story. You need a very good psychiatrist familiar with kids like Daughter. You can't fix a car without knowing what the problem is. People are the same. I don't mean to say your daughter is as unimportant as a car....just that you need an understanding of the cause to fix anything a person included.</p><p></p><p>Also you need to protect your other kids from her. And maybe start looking for a lawyer so that Dad goes back to supervised visits. There is no one book, no medication with magic, or an easy fix. And we all had to deal with things on some levels.</p><p></p><p>Your daughter needs a lot of help, all your kids do, and it won't just go away. You sound like a good mother, modeling good behavior. That is what you can do for her these six months. Maybe get her distracted and into an activity like soccer or ballet. Or take her to the humane society and walk dogs with her...show her kindness toward animals. Take her to library story time. But stay with her so you can be there if she acts out on another child. You can get very busy for six months. Busy helps time pass.</p><p></p><p>She is young. Get intensive help now and her prognosis will have more hope. This father is bad news. I hope you can gather your mother strength to help fight all these demons, Dad included. It is not easy but it is worth the battle. My son is an example. We adopted him and he was born with crack in his system and he also had syphilis and needed open heart surgery at five months that. He had to detox from the crack! We were told he would be dependent on us forever. We got very proactive and fought for so much help. Today you would never guess he is autistic. He is friendly, bright, helpful...its unreal. Early and lots of help is vital!</p><p></p><p>We are a support group. Lots of our support is sharing and suggesting what to do. You don't have to do any of it. But we share in good faith.</p><p></p><p>Love and hugs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 726073, member: 1550"] Just because you don't or haven't seen him abuse her doesn't mean he hasnt. Please....ask her. Let her know it is all right to tell you. Nothing is worse than finding out after you could have stopped the duration. Most abused kids don't tell...they are afraid. Sexally abused kids have no outward signs. Many DO act out in anger though. This could all be one issue not two. You want to know even the worst so you can understand her to help her change and go to court to remove the threat, if needed. I never saw the boy act sexual at all to anyone but he was doing it. When I asked my littles, at first they denied it. HE admitted it or I may never have known and would not have gotten them help for the abuse. A six month wait is hard. I had to wait a year for my autistic son. It was hard but the fantastic result was better than a less skilled professional. He is 24 now and on his own, kind, working doing great. He got lots of help along the way. None of us are anything but other parents sharing what we know. This behavior you sadly see is out of your field of knowledge. A good psychiatrist needs to diagnose her and he will refer her to a psychologist who will help, but also definitely explore possible abuse of all kinds by father. And find out the extent of what she has done too. Nobody can help her at all with limited knowledge. I am sorry. I know you want us to tell you that you can do something and she will change. None of us can tell you that with honesty. We and even you don't know the whole story. You need a very good psychiatrist familiar with kids like Daughter. You can't fix a car without knowing what the problem is. People are the same. I don't mean to say your daughter is as unimportant as a car....just that you need an understanding of the cause to fix anything a person included. Also you need to protect your other kids from her. And maybe start looking for a lawyer so that Dad goes back to supervised visits. There is no one book, no medication with magic, or an easy fix. And we all had to deal with things on some levels. Your daughter needs a lot of help, all your kids do, and it won't just go away. You sound like a good mother, modeling good behavior. That is what you can do for her these six months. Maybe get her distracted and into an activity like soccer or ballet. Or take her to the humane society and walk dogs with her...show her kindness toward animals. Take her to library story time. But stay with her so you can be there if she acts out on another child. You can get very busy for six months. Busy helps time pass. She is young. Get intensive help now and her prognosis will have more hope. This father is bad news. I hope you can gather your mother strength to help fight all these demons, Dad included. It is not easy but it is worth the battle. My son is an example. We adopted him and he was born with crack in his system and he also had syphilis and needed open heart surgery at five months that. He had to detox from the crack! We were told he would be dependent on us forever. We got very proactive and fought for so much help. Today you would never guess he is autistic. He is friendly, bright, helpful...its unreal. Early and lots of help is vital! We are a support group. Lots of our support is sharing and suggesting what to do. You don't have to do any of it. But we share in good faith. Love and hugs. [/QUOTE]
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