My update - cautiously optimistic

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by RN0441, Mar 1, 2018.

  1. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    Many know my story but for those that don't my son has been sober since September 2017. He was sober for a month prior to being enrolled in a long term faith based program on October 10th. We are now in year 7 of his addiction.

    He went to the program kicking and screaming and my husband left him in the parking lot after he ran out during the intake and refused to stay, backpack in hand, crying. My husband drove away with a heavy heart but we knew this was our last resort. His dad had picked him up from a rehab in Florida that he had gone into after being Baker Acted by his girlfriend for threatening suicide and spending time in a psychiatric ward. He had been in Florida since March of 2016 starting in sober living and doing very well, going to school and working at a job he liked but then always fell off the wagon and went back into the rabbit hole. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. I always felt his heart wasn't in it so I continued to work on my boundaries. I never knew how, if or when this would end.

    I'm happy to say that he is now doing very well. He finally is seeing the world through sober eyes and is saying and doing so many things that I honestly never dreamed I'd witness. This program has been absolutely a miracle for him and I cannot express how grateful I am that we were able to get him enrolled. This is exactly what he needed as nothing else worked and we tried everything. His soul was broken. I don't know how else to express it.

    He just told us that he is going on a mission to an Indian Reservation in Montana in June with a small group from the program. I am happy he is standing up to the plate rather than sitting back in the shadows. He said he is very scared because he has to tell his story there even though he has told it to those in his program many times. He is very shy socially and has social anxiety so this is a big deal for him. I am hoping that he will be enriched by this experience. He has indicated that he wants to help others so I am thinking this experience will reinforce that for him.

    He will graduate from the program in November of this year and if he keeps up as he has been I think he will have a very good chance of beating this demon that has been chasing him for so long. We will continue to support him as long as he is working on himself and moving in a positive direction. I am afraid to get too hopeful so am trying to remain neutral but I do feel hopeful.
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  2. startingfresh

    startingfresh Member

    RN, I am so glad to see your update. This all sounds very promising. I like the description he is "Seeing the world through sober eyes" . The length of the program is surely a huge plus. I love that the group is going to an Indian reservation on a mission. Focusing energy on helping others helps heal the soul. It is so good that he is taking these opportunities. I am hopeful for your son and your family. :)
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  3. Onebreathatatime

    Onebreathatatime New Member

    RN - I am so happy to hear of your son's continuing progress in the right direction! It is an inspiration to me that there is hope that my son could change his life around! I will think of you and your son's journey while trying to navigate my own! Thank you!
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  4. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    Hi Rn, It seems your son is progressing and I am so glad for you. It has been a long hard journey and you and your husband have been his champions. I think neutral yet hopeful is a good place to be. Meanwhile keep strengthening yourself. You have come so very far. Prayers going up that your son keeps going in the right direction and that this mission will open up new horizons for him.
    Thank you so much for being here and sharing good news.
  5. Baggy Bags

    Baggy Bags Active Member


    Neutral yet hopeful. Love that. Want that.
  6. Albatross

    Albatross Well-Known Member

    That's great news, RN! So happy for him and for you!

    How cool is that?! He is finding himself again, and testing his limits and surprising himself. And doing it to serve others. How wonderful. Addicts can be so selfish, yet recovering addicts so charitable...and their charity is what keeps them sober. One of God's great and beautiful mysteries, I think.
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  7. Billiesue

    Billiesue Member

    Great news!
  8. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    Live in the moment and enjoy and celebrate the moment.
    Hope with no expectations for the future. You have given your son this blessing and opportunity.
    I was at a Detox support group tonight. Some people have loved ones in 2,3 and even 5th detox. It was a group full of raw experienced people. This would count as my sons 2 detox. We all need to appreciate the small process and allow ourselves that to enjoy.

    We are the ones going through this chaos stone cold sober.

    Here’s to the next leg of rehab!! May it be better than the first!
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  9. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    So hopeful. Such a great opportunity in June. So encouraging he is facing his fears, standing down his demons.

    Nothing. Nobody can take today away. We can pray for many many more today's like this

    What a great guy!
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  10. Sam3

    Sam3 Active Member

    Thank you for sharing his progress. Its a good reminder to me to be grateful for every day that they can experience their own stability. Those are important chapters in their books, I think. Too often, I'm reserving hope waiting for more shoes to drop.

    I agree with Albie. I think it's encouraging that your son is sharing his reservations about sharing with the reservation (ha!). It's so human and humbling to admit vulnerablity like that. It seems like fragile ego is common in DCs. It would signal huge progress to me if my son would drop the bulletproof act and share his frailties and fears.
  11. in a daze

    in a daze Well-Known Member

    What a great update! He has grown so much in the past few months.
  12. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    Thank you for sharing small victories with me. I think we all need to do that to keep us grounded.

    I am going to ask him to share "his story" with us when we visit in March.

    I would love to hear what "his story" is. We lived OUR version of "his story".

    I am hoping this will be okay to ask of him.
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  13. lovemyson1

    lovemyson1 Active Member

    What a wonderful update!!! I was afraid I would read a set back when I opened this. I know you’ve been struggling with his addiction for so so long. This actually brought me to tears. My son also was changed from his faith based program so I can relate. I truly believe that’s the key. A heart and soul change that gives them the power to resist their demons. So very happy for you all! Keep the faith, enjoy every minute of his life change, & pray for his strength to continue in his new walk.
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  14. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Wonderful update, RN.

  15. worried sick mother

    worried sick mother Active Member

    Oh goodness RN, this makes me so happy to hear this wonderful news. You have had such a long journey with your son. Staying until November, that’s awesome!!!
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  16. Billiesue

    Billiesue Member

    RN so very happy for you. Encouraging to see such a positive post!
  17. Triedntrue

    Triedntrue Well-Known Member

    Very happy for you and for him.