Hi, I'm new here so if you see something I'm doing wrong, please let me know. Here for advice. Here's our problem: Middle stepson(SS2) married a narcissist, we all got along. Now comes youngest ss(SS3) who hates me and strongly dislikes his father. SS3 decides he'll fabricate a story to pit SS2 and his wife against us saying we were talking about the wife calling her a "shitty mom", so on and so forth. SO, SS2 asked us about it and we told him the truth, even SS1 who was there at the time of supposed discussion told them the truth. Well, narcissistic daughter in law would rather play victim and believe the lies so she has let this go on for over 3 years now. She refuses to come around, except at Christmas of course. They now have 2 boys who are 18 months and 4 yrs. Every time SS2 comes around, he's got the boys with him. Even when he knows he's coming to do something that prevents him from being able to tend to them. The youngest, who cries if his mama or daddy isn't holding him, won't let anyone hold him or have anything to do with him. My husband had retina repair surgery(6th one) last week, he's not allowed to lift anything above 20 pounds. Yesterday SS2 and SS1 came out to work on deer plots, and of course SS2 had the 2 boys in tow. SS2 acted like he wanted my husband to tend to them, I was at work, but he didn't come out and ask and my husband didn't acknowledge it. Last night my husband found this post on facebook by SS2: I hate when people are like "you don't bring that baby around here to see nobody , that's why she don't know us." Listen, I am not obligated to do that. I have a house and a cellphone as well as you do. You don't pick up the phone to call and check on her or come by the house to see her, so what makes you think I'm gunna run you down to be in my child's life? One thing about me, I don't push my children off on nobody or run anybody down to get my child. If she doesn't know you or have a bond with you, then that's your fault. That means you didn't play your part.Anybody else relate? He lived with his father for 20 years and knows he stays busy with the farm plus a 40 hr week job and rarely goes anywhere, besides the fact we don't feel welcome at their house. It has been his(SS2) decision to let his wife go on playing victim instead of trying to make her see the truth. We do have a very close bond to my son's 2 yr old little girl because there have never been any disputes that we couldn't discuss and work out with him or his wife, she and I are actually more like best friends. They live 2 hours away from us and we get our "doodlebug" about once a month and sometimes her mama and daddy come stay with us for the weekend too. Now, do any of you have any suggestions besides "being the bigger person"? We've already tried that.We will not be humble anymore.