I will try to keep this as short as possible: Daughter: is 34. Physically disabled (Spina Bifida) but walks with lower leg braces and she has some VERY minor learning disabilities, mainly math and some short term memory issues. If you met her you would never know it. She has an average IQ of 98. She has NOTHING wrong with her that can't be overcome. Me: Divorced from 1st hubby (her dad). Widowed from 2nd hubby, 10 years now. I have one son 17. My daughter has ALWAYS lived with me. I have supported her 100% all of these years, never asking of her to pay anything to live under my roof, and I don't' make a lot of $. If anything I have paid HER anywhere from 80.00 - 200.00 a month to pick up her brother from school and to give me alone time if I wanted to have guests. She has been collecting SSI since she turned 18. 500.00 a month and now up to 725.00. She has probably worked a total of one year since graduating high school 17 years ago. She tried to take some tech school classes but failed. Not because she can't do it, but because she quits when things get a bit hard. Some of her very first words were "I can't it's to hard, it's not my fault", and to this day that is still her favorite saying. Her failures and her quitting when the going gets rough are ALWAYS someone else's fault. So basically for the past 16 out of 17 years she has sat at home, play video games, surfed the net, watched tv, napped and went downtown to clubs on the weekend. Her only chore was to feed the cat and wash the dishes which usually sat for 2-3 days and half of time I had to do them if I wanted dishes to feed her brother! Her dad bought her a brand new car 3 years ago and she can get around just fine. My 2nd husband died 10 years ago and I have had two relationships since then that went south because they could not deal with the fact that she lived with me and basically sponged off of me. In retrospect, I can now understand that. I am now finally engaged to a wonderful man and we are getting married sometime in near future. My lease just expired and I have moved in with him. I gave her 8 months notice that this IS going to happen and that when it does she can't under any circumstances come to live with us. Between us we have 3 minor children and they are the priority. Her words at that time were " 8 months is a long time from now". I told her NO it is NOT. You need to get off your butt and get a job and start saving money. She waited until the 5th month to start applying for job that she has NO experience for and of course did not get them. She finally bit the bullet and took a job that she felt was beneath her at 10.00 and hour. Within 2 weeks they moved her up to a trainer (this is a call center) and she told me she is now making 15.00 and hour. I told her I was very proud of her and that one person can easily lived on that I just wish she would have done so sooner as now there are only 30 days left. My lease has now expired as of a week ago and I am now living with my fiance. The day we moved out her words to me were " I can't believe you are OK with this". Meaning, leaving her to fend for herself. I told her NO I am not OK with it or happy about it and I am very worried about you, but after 17 years there is NOTHING left I can do for you. You must figure out your life on your own. She then proceeded to say she might have to quit her job because she did not want to give up her 725.00 a month is SSI. I almost lost it, but calmly said, if you prefer to continue to try to live on 8000.00 a year as opposed to 30,000 a year that is your choice. I had sent her room-mate links, couch surf links, posted and add for her looking for a place to stay, sent her emergency shelter links but she never looked into them. I think she never believed my help was over. I had sent her room-mate links, couch surf links, posted and add for her looking for a place to stay, sent her emergency shelter links but she never looked into them. I think she never believed my help to her was over. I never wanted to see her homeless for God's sake but I can't support her anymore, especially when she does NOTHING to help herself and doesn't' feel a bit bad for making my life harder. It is NOT fair to my new soon to be husband I believe very selfish on her part to even consider the idea. She has never even met him or wanted to. (There is a jealousy and threat to her there because of him, life as she knew it is now over). As far as I know the first two nights or so she spent in her car. I have not heard from her since. We are going away for a week to the Keys and I feel like I want to extend an olive branch and offer to let her stay here for the week to help her out, but I am also afraid that this will enable her further or that she may not leave once we return. What to do? What to do? I am not opposed to helping those in time of need, but I have done so for for 17 years! I have NOT told my finance that she is potentially homeless as he is the type that will say "get her here NOW to stay with us". That is one thing I love about him, his giving nature. He is on many boards including Habitat for Humanity. I hate not telling him but the problem is that, he wont realize once she is here she will never leave. Feeling bad, but trying to stay strong. Thoughts shared are appreciated.