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Never disinherit your kid
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<blockquote data-quote="Dmb0145" data-source="post: 731365" data-attributes="member: 22987"><p>Oh my mother was absolulely 150% the main instigator ALWAYS, she would plant the seed then sit back and watch all the drama unfold between me and my siblings, and even though my brother the golden child until this day I think knows my mother was horrible to me, will still place the blame on me and defend her. I had to sit at her funeral mass and listen to him give a speech about how our mother was HIS HERO and how it WAS her way or the HIGHWAY and she was always RIGHT and I remember my husband looking at me while holding me hand and whispering in my ear, is he F'ING kidding me! If that wasn't a last dig at you at your mothers funeral I don't know what IS. I just chalked it up as enjoy it brother because this is the LAST DIG your ever going to get at ME because I'm done with you too! Everything you describe and I do mean EVERYTHING is my life! Mine was emotional abuse in adulthood but during my early childhood my mother would beat me and allow my brothers to beat the living hell out of me too and sit back and watch or they'd beat me while she was at work and then she'd come home and ask ME well what did you do!!!! REALLY! In fact she taught and allowed my brothers to play the role of my father once my dad and her were divorced. My father was a raging alcoholic but never put his hands on me, he was certainly NO role model but he never put his hands on me OR ever put me down, even though he was not there for me as a father should be I still knew there was a part of him that did love me and he did compliment me often even into adulthood and my mother I believe resented the hell out of that because he refused to take part in the abuse upon me! So in theory he was much smarter than my mother ever gave him credit for. I miss my dad unlike my mother. Like you, I grieved for my mothers love for years not after her death but I am still struggling with a lot of guilt probably because that is what has been instilled in me all these years but I'm working on it and as you know it takes time and it's not easy but I know I will get there. Like you, thank god my husband is amazing, very smart, mechanical engineer and me a paralegal and if the truth be told I think my mother was even jealous of my husbands education which by the way he worked his ass off for, In fact she was jealous of all the accomplishments in my life I truly believe that she never achieved. She never treated my husband right either. Always treated him like <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/2012/censored2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":censored2:" title="censored2 :censored2:" data-shortname=":censored2:" /> and my first husband who left my son and I for another women my mother just couldn't praise my ex enough REALLY but then again this is coming from a women who had an affair with a married man for 40 years, in fact my brother was more concerned about her married boyfriend while on her death bed than the feelings of his own sister, yeah nice ha! No morals! They are so quick to judge me and they are so called Christians yet his mothers betrayal of hurting another woman with children was all OK. I could go on and on but this gives you an idea of the type of mentality I AM dealing with! The irony!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Dmb0145, post: 731365, member: 22987"] Oh my mother was absolulely 150% the main instigator ALWAYS, she would plant the seed then sit back and watch all the drama unfold between me and my siblings, and even though my brother the golden child until this day I think knows my mother was horrible to me, will still place the blame on me and defend her. I had to sit at her funeral mass and listen to him give a speech about how our mother was HIS HERO and how it WAS her way or the HIGHWAY and she was always RIGHT and I remember my husband looking at me while holding me hand and whispering in my ear, is he F'ING kidding me! If that wasn't a last dig at you at your mothers funeral I don't know what IS. I just chalked it up as enjoy it brother because this is the LAST DIG your ever going to get at ME because I'm done with you too! Everything you describe and I do mean EVERYTHING is my life! Mine was emotional abuse in adulthood but during my early childhood my mother would beat me and allow my brothers to beat the living hell out of me too and sit back and watch or they'd beat me while she was at work and then she'd come home and ask ME well what did you do!!!! REALLY! In fact she taught and allowed my brothers to play the role of my father once my dad and her were divorced. My father was a raging alcoholic but never put his hands on me, he was certainly NO role model but he never put his hands on me OR ever put me down, even though he was not there for me as a father should be I still knew there was a part of him that did love me and he did compliment me often even into adulthood and my mother I believe resented the hell out of that because he refused to take part in the abuse upon me! So in theory he was much smarter than my mother ever gave him credit for. I miss my dad unlike my mother. Like you, I grieved for my mothers love for years not after her death but I am still struggling with a lot of guilt probably because that is what has been instilled in me all these years but I'm working on it and as you know it takes time and it's not easy but I know I will get there. Like you, thank god my husband is amazing, very smart, mechanical engineer and me a paralegal and if the truth be told I think my mother was even jealous of my husbands education which by the way he worked his ass off for, In fact she was jealous of all the accomplishments in my life I truly believe that she never achieved. She never treated my husband right either. Always treated him like :censored2: and my first husband who left my son and I for another women my mother just couldn't praise my ex enough REALLY but then again this is coming from a women who had an affair with a married man for 40 years, in fact my brother was more concerned about her married boyfriend while on her death bed than the feelings of his own sister, yeah nice ha! No morals! They are so quick to judge me and they are so called Christians yet his mothers betrayal of hurting another woman with children was all OK. I could go on and on but this gives you an idea of the type of mentality I AM dealing with! The irony! [/QUOTE]
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