New Years Resolutions yes or no?

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by SomewhereOutThere, Jan 1, 2019.

  1. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I usually dont. Well, I do and I dont. Depends on the year :)

    This year I already lost the weight I needed and things are pretty good at the SWOT house. But we can always improve things.

    I did promise myself to be able to learn to relax better. I am very hyper and even watching a movie means walking around. I have trouble feeling calm even though nothing of any drama is going on. So I am going to work on that.

    Another big one for myself is to finally, finally truly forgive my family. Its time. I plan to go to church for help with this. I am spiritual rather than religious but I really love Jesus so any church can help.

    I already had my husband block my ability to look at the site my sister posts on, Pintetest which she also posts on and the FB accounts that I need to be unable to check.

    Somehow (this is amusing) my husband found a way that if I try to, say, look at the site my Sis posts on or Pintarest I get the face of an old lady with a tongue that hangs out of her mouth. It says "go back" on her tongue lol

    I am not on FB myself but my hub blocked me from being able to look at any FB of anyone even remotely connected to the family.

    Its a relief. I feel very far from them and finally safe, even.from myself, feeling like I can peek. I dont know how to undo all that. I dont want to know.

    I cant stop anyone from reading my stuff here but that isnt.my problem.

    Now that I have let go completely of any ability to check up on them or their kids, it is time to remember that this family made me stronger and that only forgiveness sets us free. Or me free.

    Anyone else?
     
    Last edited: Jan 1, 2019
  2. Elsi

    Elsi Active Member

    I think of New Years as an opportunity to reboot my habits. I do set some goals for the year - usually a health goal, a financial goal, and a relationship/happiness goal. And then I define the daily/weekly habits I need to follow to get there.

    I’m trying out some apps this year for goal setting and habit tracking. Trying Strides, Productive, IGoals, and Goals Wizard. I’ll purchase full edition of whichever one seems to be the most useful for me. I also have a journaling app I use to reflect on each day and set goals for the next day.

    In general, I find it more helpful for me to focus on habits and actions rather than outcomes. If I set a resolution to lose 30 pounds I get discouraged if I get off track or it’s not happening fast enough. But I can decide to give up sugar, do yoga five days a week, or eat only homemade healthy meals for a month. I can control that.

    I also have to be careful not to put too much emphasis on the New Years date. I can be all or nothing, which can lead to going totally off the rails if I slip up. That’s why I tend to think of this as a reboot/recalibration rather than ‘a brand new start’. That’s too much pressure. It’s a reboot, and if I need to reboot again in a couple months, I can - I don’t to wait a whole year!
     
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  3. Tired out

    Tired out Active Member

    Woohoo! Good for you. Let it go sister! I am good at forgiving.
    Now that doesn't mean I will forget and let someone kick me 3 more times.
     
  4. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    No. Forgetting wont happen. Forgiving needs to.
     
  5. Nomad

    Nomad Well-Known Member

    I hit some deactivate button on FB. It gave me a seven day option. It opened up yesterday. It had been seven days. I took a quick peak. Perhaps five minutes. It was interesting, but it seemed a little bull sxxxxy. I quickly did the seven day block again. I can’t post and neither can anyone else. I had set a goal last year to reduce my usuage. I would, then be too active, then catch myself and stop. I simply think it’s not healthy. I DO find it somehow a huge part of the millennial world. I mean huge. If it’s not on FB, did it happen? Is it real? Does it matter? So, having very limited access is ok for me, for now.

    Five minutes every seven days is my current rate of usage! As I said, VERY limited. Lol.

    One resolution is not to have to lose so much weight in January. Every Jan since forever, I find myself in trouble diet wise. This needs to stop. I want to get to goal weight within six months and maybe allow myself two pound gain between TG and New Years. Two pound gain. That’s it. So, in Jan 2020 I have to diet two pounds away. That’s it. I need to write that up clearly/ succinctly.

    I’m working on a few others and one will be not to be overly sensitive. Please refer to my recent book purchase : The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Darn*

    * This is a “substitute” word
     
  6. newstart

    newstart Active Member

    Resolutions are stronger when they are written down.
    I want to get back to teaching.
    I will surround myself with fun, healthy minded friends. I have friends that I love dearly but they live unhealthy life styles, my dear friend has 2 bars in her house, one complete with 36 different types of beer. I do not drink alcohol at all and she looks at me like I have lost my mind.
    I want to get back off sugar. I felt so much better and stronger.
    I want to find a car that is simple with good visability
    I want to find a decent dentist.
    I want to dress better. I try on clothes and do not like how they feel or how it is made. If you know of a good clothes store that is for women age 61 please tell me. Norstroms is one of my favorite.
    I want this year to be peaceful, I need peace and tranquity.
     
  7. Nomad

    Nomad Well-Known Member

    I agree! Writing the goals down is the very best way. I’m weiting them today.
     
  8. Crayola13

    Crayola13 Active Member

    I need to do a better job of keeping the house clean. Problem is my arthritis and back spasms.
     
  9. Crayola13

    Crayola13 Active Member


    My mom orders a lot of clothes from QVC. She says the quality is always good
     
  10. Nomad

    Nomad Well-Known Member

    I am finding it a little harder to get clothes I like.

    I will go to Macys, but I have to look carefully. If rushing, sometimes I will take home four shirts and try them on at home and return two.

    I have a few things from Qvc.. but again, I find that I have to be careful.
    Nordstrom’s can be lovely.

    A catalog called “soft Surroundings” has good things.

    I find that plain clothes with no patterns or very simple patterns look best on me lately.

    A few long scarves and a few long necklaces are nice.

    I just can’t buy things as easily / quickly as before. Not sure exactly why. More time and thought is needed.
     
  11. Elsi

    Elsi Active Member

    Something I discovered at our Macy’s - and I think this may be all of them - you can call and make an appointment with a personal shopper for Free! I don’t really navigate large department stores well and tend to buy most of my clothes online. (And I tend to wear pretty much the same thing all the time anyway.) but when I was shopping for a mother of the bride dress E set up a personal shopper appointment and it was wonderful! I described on the phone what we were looking for and my size, and the personal shopper had a bunch of stuff for me to try in a large special dressing room area I never knew existed. When we wanted something a little different she went out and pulled some new things to try. She even brought shoes and jewelry to Try! It was fabulous! I asked if it had to be something like a wedding to get this service and she said no I could get a personal shopper anytime I wanted one. If I ever have to buy clothes outside my norm again I will definitely do that.

    Working from home I don’t feel the need to have a lot of different outfits to impress anyone anymore. And I like to be comfortable. I still have a lot of sensory issues around clothing that binds or scratches. So it’s long flowy dresses or skirts in the summer and either tunics and leggings or soft flowy pants and sweaters in the winter. Yala Designs is my go to. Their bamboo fabrics are wonderful. I feel like I’m in pajamas all day long.
     
  12. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I love my Mother of the Bride dress. My girls were both with me. I have a poor sense of fashion and little interest. Except for not wanting to dress like a grandma, I just wear casual stuff and Target works for me.

    I never had a job where I had to dress up. And for once my genes have served me well. Especially since I am now thinner, people always think I look young and good for my age and so Target is fine.

    My husband and I are homebodies anyway.

    But maybe one day I will post my Motjer of the Bride dress. It is the only dress I own and it is so pretty that I cried when I looked in the mirror.

    Although I dont think Grandma should dress in the same clothes her granddaughter may, I dont think we need to look old and stodgy either!

    Go Grandma!!!
     
  13. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    Jabber always says he once made New Year's Resolution and that was to not ever make another New Year's Resolution. :D

    I used to always say I was resolved to not have extra-marital sex or do illegal drugs.:p I can always keep those.

    In all seriousness, I'm not really making a "resolution" because I never keep them. But, I want to:

    1. get the house in order.
    2. get back on track with my diet.
    3. exercise more.
    4. finish projects I've started. (Remember my kitchen? I do. Every minute of every day. :()

    These aren't resolutions...because they're perpetually on the list of things I never get done. :unsure: So...maybe I'll just resolve to try harder?
     
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  14. Elsi

    Elsi Active Member

    Lil, this is why I don't consider mine New Year's "Resolutions" so much as a "reboot/recalibration". An opportunity to get back on track. And the year has many! Spring, with its emphasis on renewal...summer, when the light pulls us outside...fall, which still feel like a "back to school" fresh start even after all these years...my birthday...New Years in just ONE opportunity to reflect, recalibrate and get ourselves back on track. Feeling like it's the one and only chance in the year, and setting up one-time pass/fail resolutions, is too much pressure for me!
     
  15. Nomad

    Nomad Well-Known Member

    "Reboot," is something I might consider.

    I tend to do fairly well, until about Oct . And then, I often go haywire around Thanksgiving...especially in the diet department. I find dieting, in particular, very hard if my husband is totally out of control with his eating as he has been of late. If he is at least moderate, I'm ok. But family and work stress I think has gotten him turning to food. I've told him that we, but maybe even moreso him, need to find other outlets that are healthier to reduce stress.

    I've even wondered if having a large dog to walk might be soothing.
     
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  16. newstart

    newstart Active Member

    Thank you for the wonderful suggestions. I am going to the mall today to try to find some decent clothes. I do not like the thin onion paper tops or anything binding or cutting my circulation off in anyway. In the summer I love skirts and dresses. In the winter I dress very warm and do not care about how it looks as long as I am toasty warm. My husband said I need to revamp my style, I asked him what style since comfort is my number one concern. We are still involved with many things so I need to look somewhat put together. I will keep the same resolutions as lil no extra sex outside of my marriage and no illegal drugs LOL guess I could just check that off my list already. I like how Elsi said reboot or recalibration. Also Elsi, I never knew about the person shopper Macy's has. What a great service and thank you so much for letting me know.
    Thank you all of these insightful comments. Deep prayers for a very good 2019.