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Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Lolag, Sep 11, 2018.

  1. Lolag

    Lolag Lolag

    I'm a mom of a highly volatile, very intelligent and charming and sick young man. I am divorced and he is my only adopted son and I am heart broken, scared, and at a loss of what to do ,both for him, and myself.
     
  2. Beta

    Beta Member

    I'm sorry. I too have an adopted son, 28 yo, and my husband and I are heartbroken and at a loss. Our son is probably Bipolar. He lives in another state and we don't know where he lives, if he's working, eating, or what will become of him. What is your son struggling with?
     
  3. Lolag

    Lolag Lolag

    He has always had behavioral issues from day 1 (we adopted him at 3 days old). Kicked out of daycare for crying too much, kicked out of numerous schools thru high school. He is 19yo now and has been in trouble with the law, very impulsive and angers easily. Smashed out all my kitchen windows in a fit of anger, pulled out my thermostat. Destroys objects, but never hurts anyone physically that is. Been to psychiatric hospitals for very brief stays. He is a loving,charming and sweet young man until his anger hits. Sometimes for no apparent reason. The last psychiatric hospitalization he was threatening to kill himself, said he hates feeling this way and he doesn't even know what sets him off. This is when the MD said he thought he has a personality disorder. At a loss of what to do and extremely scared for him.
     
  4. Triedntrue

    Triedntrue Active Member

    I am sorry for your need to be here. Have they offered any options to treat your son with medications? There are a variety of personality disorders were they more specific? My son is bipolar but had done the explosive behaviors at times as well it can be scary to be around them. You need to consider your safety. At one time a dr. Mentioned explosive personality disorder to me. I don't know much about it. I also suggest you get counceling for yourself to help you find ways to deal with your son as well as giving you some much needed support. Good luck and keep posting.
     
  5. Lolag

    Lolag Lolag

    Thank you for your support!!
     
  6. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Was he exposed to drugs or alcohol in utero? This is big especially with adopted kids. Their use affects the developing brain and causes varuous degrees of academic and behavioral problems. My son was addicted to crack at birth. His foster parents told me he would scream. He is lucky to only have high functioning autism.

    It is hard to correctly diagnose an adopted child without knowing anything about the DNA and the birthmothers way of caring for hersrlf while pregnant. My sons birthmother was a drug addict and had losr custody of her four other birth children. He was her fifth drug affected. He is 25 now and doing well.
     
  7. Nomad

    Nomad Well-Known Member

    We have an adopted daughter, age 30.
    Diagnosed very young as Bipolar.
    Prior to medications, she had violent tendencies and was extremely erratic.
    Today, she is moody and erratic at times.
    Better, but still not a really good situation.
    She does a tad better when in therapy, but she refuses to go.
    If you feel your adult child is a danger to you, make sure Security is a top concern. Locks and alarms for your home. Call the police if he hurts or threatens you.
    If you do communicate well with your child, you might offer to pay for a psychological evaluation (always pay the doctor directly) and offer him therapy as well. He likely needs medications.
    Consider groups like Family Anonymous for yourself for Local Support or even short term therapy for yourself if you aren’t doing that already.
    Having a child like this is very draining.
     
  8. Lolag

    Lolag Lolag

     
  9. Lolag

    Lolag Lolag

    Hi!! I have no idea re: his exposure to drugs in utero, but highly suspect it. His birth moms 3 other kids were taken away and since 3 days old he's been a handful. Crying unless he was held constantly, wanting skin to skin contact, etc.
     
  10. Lolag

    Lolag Lolag

     
  11. Lolag

    Lolag Lolag

    My son is 19 and currently living at home. He has seen numerous therapist, a # of very brief hospitalizations to no avail. He won't take medications, doesn't want to go to therapy, on probation. It seems to be escalating the older he gets.