Hi all - like so many of you, I have been on and off this board many times over the years, trying to find answers and others who understand. I feel like I have almost seen it all with my son, now 26 - drugs, incarceration, homelessness, verbal abuse and ultimately physical abuse, which led to my moving out of the house I shared with him. I love him, but I just couldn't take it anymore. We moved out of our house in March, right as all the COVID craziness was starting. I moved into a nice apartment with my boyfriend and our pets. It is so nice coming home to a calm environment every day. No more walking on eggshells to see what kind of mood my son will be in each day. My son was homeless for awhile. I would meet him periodically at his request and give him rides, food, and yes, even money at times. It hurt seeing him homeless, but I had finally learned to put myself first. He was begging on the street corners for money. He finally was able to rent a room from someone for awhile. Of course, after a few months, that was no longer working out. He called me on a Sunday, basically demanding that I drive out to where he was staying (about 40 minutes from me) and help him move out that very day. I told him I could not help him that day for multiple reasons - it was Sunday late afternoon, and I had to prepare for work the next day; it was pouring down rain, etc etc. I told him I could help him the following weekend. He yelled at me repeatedly, and finally stated that if I didn't come help him that day, I "would never see or hear from him again." So far he has held true to his word, and I have not seen him or heard from him in over 3 months. I honestly can't believe he has not contacted me for help, rides, money, etc. I think he has blocked my number on his phone, as I have tried to call and text him a few times and it doesn't go through. Honestly, in some ways it is a relief, but also, it is very sad knowing I have a son out there in the world, and I have no idea where he is. His dad has not heard from him, either. I think he always wanted to live "off the grid," and it seems he may have found a way to do just that. Of course, I also worry something bad has happened to him. I am curious to hear from others who may be estranged from their adult children - how do you handle it? How do you control the worries and fears? I have started seeing a therapist, which definitely helps some. I also have a wonderful young adult daughter, so I try and focus on her as much as I can. But, in quiet moments especially, it hurts. Thank you in advance for your replies. Happy New Year, and God bless!