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Parent Emeritus
Not sure how I survived
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 759507" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Welcome Stillhopeful. I am glad you're now formally here.</p><p></p><p>I adopted my son from foster care too. He was 22 months. He is now 32. What can I say?</p><p></p><p>My son also completed a year of college. Honestly, I would never ever have imagined he would take the path he did. But now that we are here I kind of see it as inevitable. He lives marginally. He will live as he is able. My son can't hold a job or won't.</p><p></p><p>I am not helping anymore. It's not my problem. I recognize now and accept that all lives don't go on an upswing. It's hard but way less hard than it used to be.</p><p></p><p>I used to put myself at the center. It's like I acted as the punching bag in his life. I felt all of the blows. I felt them when he didn't.</p><p></p><p>Finally, when I had allowed myself to be almost destroyed, I began to take myself out of the ring. I had to make a choice between life and death. I chose to live.</p><p></p><p>You are not alone. You know that.</p><p></p><p>I think there is room for hope. But the only way that can work, is as you say, letting go. Acceptance, that we are out of it. Getting out of the ring.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 759507, member: 18958"] Welcome Stillhopeful. I am glad you're now formally here. I adopted my son from foster care too. He was 22 months. He is now 32. What can I say? My son also completed a year of college. Honestly, I would never ever have imagined he would take the path he did. But now that we are here I kind of see it as inevitable. He lives marginally. He will live as he is able. My son can't hold a job or won't. I am not helping anymore. It's not my problem. I recognize now and accept that all lives don't go on an upswing. It's hard but way less hard than it used to be. I used to put myself at the center. It's like I acted as the punching bag in his life. I felt all of the blows. I felt them when he didn't. Finally, when I had allowed myself to be almost destroyed, I began to take myself out of the ring. I had to make a choice between life and death. I chose to live. You are not alone. You know that. I think there is room for hope. But the only way that can work, is as you say, letting go. Acceptance, that we are out of it. Getting out of the ring. [/QUOTE]
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