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General Parenting
Not sure if I should be concerned - thankful for this group.
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 758272" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Dear Mame</p><p></p><p>First I want to say how much I support you and I want to acknowledge how hard all of this is. </p><p></p><p>That said, I want to say this: You have no control here except over what you expose yourself to and allow in your home. You have every right to protect yourself against abuse and danger. I think calling the police when you feel threatened (or were) is exactly the right thing. </p><p></p><p>What your husband permits when he is away from him is his choice. He is a father and a grown man. I don't see how we can legitimately influence him in his decisions regarding his child. It's very hard for a parent to accept the reality when they're child is going in the wrong direction.</p><p></p><p>I agree with RN. The way to handle this is to make your own life better. Safer, more fun, with less conflict and more meaning. </p><p></p><p>While this situation has affected you, it doesn't have to be your problem. You can move this problem to the periphery of your life, and go about your own life, in the most positive way you can find. You can be available to support your husband and give him counsel, on a limited basis, if he wants that. </p><p></p><p>But that is not the same as allowing this conflict to be at your door and in your place. This family drama does not have to be yours. I agree with every single thing you do to set limits. I would try not to engage in any way about this. If your husband talks about it, I would encourage him to go to Al Anon or go to counseling.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 758272, member: 18958"] Dear Mame First I want to say how much I support you and I want to acknowledge how hard all of this is. That said, I want to say this: You have no control here except over what you expose yourself to and allow in your home. You have every right to protect yourself against abuse and danger. I think calling the police when you feel threatened (or were) is exactly the right thing. What your husband permits when he is away from him is his choice. He is a father and a grown man. I don't see how we can legitimately influence him in his decisions regarding his child. It's very hard for a parent to accept the reality when they're child is going in the wrong direction. I agree with RN. The way to handle this is to make your own life better. Safer, more fun, with less conflict and more meaning. While this situation has affected you, it doesn't have to be your problem. You can move this problem to the periphery of your life, and go about your own life, in the most positive way you can find. You can be available to support your husband and give him counsel, on a limited basis, if he wants that. But that is not the same as allowing this conflict to be at your door and in your place. This family drama does not have to be yours. I agree with every single thing you do to set limits. I would try not to engage in any way about this. If your husband talks about it, I would encourage him to go to Al Anon or go to counseling. [/QUOTE]
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Not sure if I should be concerned - thankful for this group.
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