In case you didn't read my other thread, basically, our 31 year old son is addicted to pain killers. A couple of weeks back he was given the choice by his employer to either go to rehab immediately or lose his job. He could have gone to rehab paid for by the company and had a job waiting for him when he came back, but for whatever reason, the next day he decided not to go to treatment. So now he has nothing. No job, no money, not even anything of value that he could sell. His mother and I would really still like to see him get help. But how does one go about getting help when one has no money or means to make money? He's too old to be on our medical insurance and we couldn't possibly pay the thousands of dollars rehab must cost without taking out a loan, and I don't know about his mother, but I am not willing to do that.
Rehab options if you have no money?
- Thread starter Scott_G
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PatriotsGirl
Well-Known Member
I would not pay a ton of money if they were not ready. If they are not ready and don't want it, you could lose a ton of money - many here have and their children are still using.
My brother went to a free rehab in Massachusetts when he was an adult and ready to get help. He did it all on his own - we didn't even know that he was in rehab until after he was out and clean.
My daughter will be attending rehab once she gives birth. It is a free rehab and she is court ordered so we are not paying anything.
Resources are out there - not easy to find - everyone would want free rehab. Seems to me he made a HUGE mistake in walking away and he needs to feel those consequences...he is 31 - not 18 or 19...
My brother went to a free rehab in Massachusetts when he was an adult and ready to get help. He did it all on his own - we didn't even know that he was in rehab until after he was out and clean.
My daughter will be attending rehab once she gives birth. It is a free rehab and she is court ordered so we are not paying anything.
Resources are out there - not easy to find - everyone would want free rehab. Seems to me he made a HUGE mistake in walking away and he needs to feel those consequences...he is 31 - not 18 or 19...
compassion
Member
NA meetings are very available. No cost/ can contribute a dollar if able.
BusynMember
Well-Known Member
Your son has no intention of quitting. He gave up his job instead of going for help. What makes you think that if you take a loan that you can't afford and send him to rehab that he will quit using? He probably won't even go or he'll walk out after two days. He isn't in the mindset of one who wants to quit. Don't waste a dime thinking you can make him better. Just going to a rehab is no guarantee. There are plenty of free rehabs and N/A and if somebody really wants to quit, they will. If they don't, just going to a rehab won't do anything.
I know a woman who was sent to rehab eleven times, court ordered. Last I heard she was still using. She walked out each time. This is not worth your retirement. Only your son, who is closing in on middle age now, can help himself. You can only control yourselves. I know the helpless feeling. Hugs!!!!!
You may want to go to Narc-Anon or Al-Anon. I highly recommend those meetings to anyone with a loved one who is an addict.
I know a woman who was sent to rehab eleven times, court ordered. Last I heard she was still using. She walked out each time. This is not worth your retirement. Only your son, who is closing in on middle age now, can help himself. You can only control yourselves. I know the helpless feeling. Hugs!!!!!
You may want to go to Narc-Anon or Al-Anon. I highly recommend those meetings to anyone with a loved one who is an addict.
Oh I have no intention of giving him ANY more financial support. Basically I am just working on a script for how to communicate with him (based on something I read on another post here) and deal with possible situations that may arise. If he does by some miracle ask for help I want to say: "Sorry but your mother and I can't afford to pay for your treatment, but if you call X, they can help you for little or no cost." As far as I am concenred, he's more than worn out all of his chances with us (just need to make sure my wife gets on board and stays on board) and even if he did go to treatment, I would not allow him to live under our roof and I would not give him any financail support. I have been very angry at him for the last two weeks. As far as I am concerned, he has been given more than enough second chances since he started screwing up at age 14 and now the time for just one more chance has passed.
Many community health centers have rehab programs. When my difficult child still lived in our state, she qualified for the community health center's mental health treatment program and also went to their 30-day inpatient rehab program. She was accepted on a sliding scale since she didn't have insurance at a very low cost.
Look into your community health center programs for people that either are low income or jobless. I would do it for my own piece of mind so when and if he asks for help getting treatment you know where to point him.
MWM is right, though. If he wouldn't even go to rehab that his job would pay for in order to keep his job, he really isn't interested in getting clean and sober at this point.
~Kathy
Look into your community health center programs for people that either are low income or jobless. I would do it for my own piece of mind so when and if he asks for help getting treatment you know where to point him.
MWM is right, though. If he wouldn't even go to rehab that his job would pay for in order to keep his job, he really isn't interested in getting clean and sober at this point.
~Kathy
