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<blockquote data-quote="OutOfOptions2k17" data-source="post: 706657" data-attributes="member: 21276"><p>It's hard to tell if his skills are at the right grade level or not. How do you weed out just being lazy vs not knowing the material? When he does do the work, his grades come back fine (C or better) so the assumption as always been he is more than capable of doing the work, he just chooses not too because it's not important to him. We've come to the conclusion that the home/online schooling is not working as well, and it will very likely be changing soon. I say this because over the past weekend we had an incident that required calling the police and pressing charges. He is rightfully pissed/upset about being grounded, but it's been explained to him many times now that until he begins to change his ways he isn't going to get anything back in return. These changes also need to be carried over time, meaning just because he does everything we ask for a week straight it does not mean everything is automatically returned. I know that may seem impossible for him because there is no set date or time, but we've explained to him that as we seem him improve and constantly do the things we expect we will be more than happy to allow time to game, phone, etc. It does not mean he will get to keep his phone or he will get any time the next day but we will reward the good behavior we see.</p><p></p><p>After picking him up from work this past Sunday, he was asking to do something and the answer was no. Again it went into why we are "ruining the fun times of his life" and it was explained to him that he needs to change HIS ways and it's really not that difficult in terms of what we are asking. Since he's only allowed to get his phone while at work, he was asked for it once home. Threw it towards the door in his room and then proceeded for an hour to play his electronic keyboard, guitar, and music as loud as he could. We asked him multiple times (in a calm voice) to turn it down and that he was disturbing the rest of the house. His reply was "No I won't turn it down and that's the point." This also included going into the bath room to turn the faucet and shower off/on repeatedly. This resulted in warning him the last time to either stop or the power gets turned off to his room. This lead to banging/drumming instead of the TV or keyboard, so the police were called. Upon finding that out he punched a hole in his bedroom wall. They wrote a report for unruly and after talking with the prosecutors office we decided to follow through with charges which will be for truancy & disobedience. The truancy because he's refusing to attend school during requested/designated hours even though per school he is attending. We will get a call from someone in 7-10 days for next steps, but things are definitely not in a good space currently. The entire house is on edge.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="OutOfOptions2k17, post: 706657, member: 21276"] It's hard to tell if his skills are at the right grade level or not. How do you weed out just being lazy vs not knowing the material? When he does do the work, his grades come back fine (C or better) so the assumption as always been he is more than capable of doing the work, he just chooses not too because it's not important to him. We've come to the conclusion that the home/online schooling is not working as well, and it will very likely be changing soon. I say this because over the past weekend we had an incident that required calling the police and pressing charges. He is rightfully pissed/upset about being grounded, but it's been explained to him many times now that until he begins to change his ways he isn't going to get anything back in return. These changes also need to be carried over time, meaning just because he does everything we ask for a week straight it does not mean everything is automatically returned. I know that may seem impossible for him because there is no set date or time, but we've explained to him that as we seem him improve and constantly do the things we expect we will be more than happy to allow time to game, phone, etc. It does not mean he will get to keep his phone or he will get any time the next day but we will reward the good behavior we see. After picking him up from work this past Sunday, he was asking to do something and the answer was no. Again it went into why we are "ruining the fun times of his life" and it was explained to him that he needs to change HIS ways and it's really not that difficult in terms of what we are asking. Since he's only allowed to get his phone while at work, he was asked for it once home. Threw it towards the door in his room and then proceeded for an hour to play his electronic keyboard, guitar, and music as loud as he could. We asked him multiple times (in a calm voice) to turn it down and that he was disturbing the rest of the house. His reply was "No I won't turn it down and that's the point." This also included going into the bath room to turn the faucet and shower off/on repeatedly. This resulted in warning him the last time to either stop or the power gets turned off to his room. This lead to banging/drumming instead of the TV or keyboard, so the police were called. Upon finding that out he punched a hole in his bedroom wall. They wrote a report for unruly and after talking with the prosecutors office we decided to follow through with charges which will be for truancy & disobedience. The truancy because he's refusing to attend school during requested/designated hours even though per school he is attending. We will get a call from someone in 7-10 days for next steps, but things are definitely not in a good space currently. The entire house is on edge. [/QUOTE]
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