Starting a new therapist for myself today ...

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by TerryJ2, May 2, 2013.

  1. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Her son has Asperger's. :) A friend recommended her. difficult child has been really argumentative lately and says it's my fault. (Of course; it's always someone else's fault.) Still, I left a msg with-his psychiatrist about his symptoms on Depakote: trembling hands, pounding heart, agitation, anxiety attacks. He said he wants to go back to lithium and put up with-the nosebleeds. I agree! Although I don't want to do anything dangerous. Sigh. Yesterday the two of us got into a prolonged argument/discussion where we both ended up in tears. It was the result of two dr appts on the same day, Tuesday, which difficult child hates to do. The problem is, so many appts end up on Tuesdays because that is the only day that husband can take off. And in fact, I had a dr appointment for difficult child Wed but the dr office called and changed it. Not my fault! I told him that but he harassed me in the car for 1/2 hr on the way there, just like he used to do. Then he started all over again yesterday. Then he told me that his girlfriend is his only friend and he thinks about dying all the time but is too afraid to kill himself. Arrgh. I know that he's miserable ... and so am I. I really think he's got a dual diagnosis. This is a well-earned appointment for myself today. Sorry about no paragraphs; this screen doesn't like my keyboard.
  2. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Awwww Terry, I hope the appointment with the new therapist helps you and that you find her to be supportive, understanding and empathetic and that she provides you a really nourishing environment where you can recharge. Sending hugs.............
  3. SearchingForRainbows

    SearchingForRainbows Active Member

    Many hugs... It's extremely difficult raising a teen difficult child, what an understatement!! It's even more difficult when you haven't found the right medications and dosages. I was very fortunate because the medications the psychiatrist prescribed the first time around turned out to be good choices for difficult child 1 - I don't think I would have survived the teen years otherwise!!

    It sounds like your new therapist will be a good fit. Having a son with Asperger's, she should be able to understand where you're coming from. This is a huge plus!!

    Raging hormones, unstable difficult child... A toxic combo... I wish I had some words of wisdom to help you... All I can do is let you know I really understand... It's a long, rocky road but I know you'll find a smoother path ahead...

    Thinking of you today... SFR
  4. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry, Terry. I hope this new therapist can help you.
    Last edited: May 3, 2013
  5. Dixies_fire

    Dixies_fire Member

    Sounds rough. -hugs-
  6. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    Ugh. So sorry that you have been having such a rough time lately. It is so frustrating playing the medication wheel of fortune. Enjoy your tie at the therapist. I have been going to one that I love for about a month or so. She is really opening my eyes. She usually deals with difficult children. And, she has me focusing on ME. Not just talking about difficult child.

    Hugs. I hope the therapist is a good experience.
  7. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Thank you all. She is very nice and asks good questions. She's very validating. Mostly, it was just dumping information on her today. But it felt good to vent. One thing that came up was that she asked me if I was disappointed in myself, in regard to where I am in life. I said yes! I had planned to have several books published by now, either novels or children's picture books or both. And I live in an area of VA that is not really art friendly. I think she can help me with-that. I am going out of town tomorrow for a very short vacation; husband has a chiro convention and I am tagging along. I'm hoping to go horseback riding. Fingers crossed! difficult child is staying with-a friend. I hope it all works out and I don't get a phonecall with-some disaster at home ...
  8. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    Terry, I'm so glad to hear that you've found a therapist for yourself, AND that she seems to be a good fit.

    Seeing a therapist during the most difficult difficult child years (15 to 20-ish) was one of the best things I could have done for myself. I still go for the occasional "tune-up" when I'm wrestling with something, but for a while I was in his office twice a week.

    Your difficult child reminds me so much of mine. At each stage of development, he seems to have been walking down the same path. I hope that your experience with your therapist remains positive. It's so important not to lose yourself when you're deep in the difficult child trenches, but it's so easy to do. I think this is a wonderful step.

    Many hugs, my friend
  9. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    And I hope you have a wonderful time horseback riding. Honestly, if there's a crisis let husband handle it. You need some time for YOU.
  10. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    How funny that I forgot about this note, and how prophetic!
    I got a call from P's assisted living ctr--she was taken to the hospital with-an infected wound. I was out of town, and her Visiting Angels caregiver had a day off. I called easy child, and she went to the hospital and stayed with-P, and drove her back to assisted living.
    I still had to call the hospital to okay my easy child being there, and then had to confirm the scrip over the phone, but all-in-all, it could have been worse.
    Also, difficult child went to an ROTC dinner and I had to arrange for a ride for him, so we had a friend take him and his girlfriend. The next night, the friend and his mom were out late and difficult child didn't get back to their house until 11:30. Sigh. Texting in the middle of the night really ticked off husband.

    I'm still glad I went. It was worth it for the horseback riding and the champagne, and the soak in the heated mineral pool, and the Jacuzzi with-waterfalls, and not having to do dishes.