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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 759024" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Dear newstart: I am sorry this is so hard. It's hard for me too. I can't remember if your daughter takes medication for her bipolar. Frequently people with this disorder resist medication because they like the mania. But still, many, many people are medication complaint.</p><p></p><p>The thing is, like my son, she is mentally ill. While I can't accept that my son won't mature and change I know in my heart that mental illness requires treatment. The behaviors won't go away without treatment. But, like you, I have no control to make anything happen. My son does only what he wants. He won't listen to me.</p><p></p><p>That said, I feel quite certain there must be a lot of information available on the internet for families of bipolar people. There must be counsel available about how to encourage treatment compliance. </p><p></p><p>But the thing is, it's back to you. Unless she takes medication and gets treatment, she will keep on this way, and it will keep being extraordinarily difficult and painful for you, just as it is for me, with my son.</p><p></p><p>We are in the same spot. We love them. But we can't stand how they live. We can't accept yet the reality of the situation we are in. We want them to change, even though we have no control to make them change. We want them to deal constructively with their problems, when their non-compliance, and lack of motivation may be factors or characteristics or symptoms of their mental illness.</p><p></p><p>What I am writing is that the ball is in our court. The changing will have to come from us. As for me, I am gradually coming to see that reality. The thing that has me stuck is the acceptance part. I cannot accept that for the rest of my life, and afterwards, my son will be more or less the same as he is now. I can't accept the pain of it. And the loss of it. I don't know why I fight it so. Love.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 759024, member: 18958"] Dear newstart: I am sorry this is so hard. It's hard for me too. I can't remember if your daughter takes medication for her bipolar. Frequently people with this disorder resist medication because they like the mania. But still, many, many people are medication complaint. The thing is, like my son, she is mentally ill. While I can't accept that my son won't mature and change I know in my heart that mental illness requires treatment. The behaviors won't go away without treatment. But, like you, I have no control to make anything happen. My son does only what he wants. He won't listen to me. That said, I feel quite certain there must be a lot of information available on the internet for families of bipolar people. There must be counsel available about how to encourage treatment compliance. But the thing is, it's back to you. Unless she takes medication and gets treatment, she will keep on this way, and it will keep being extraordinarily difficult and painful for you, just as it is for me, with my son. We are in the same spot. We love them. But we can't stand how they live. We can't accept yet the reality of the situation we are in. We want them to change, even though we have no control to make them change. We want them to deal constructively with their problems, when their non-compliance, and lack of motivation may be factors or characteristics or symptoms of their mental illness. What I am writing is that the ball is in our court. The changing will have to come from us. As for me, I am gradually coming to see that reality. The thing that has me stuck is the acceptance part. I cannot accept that for the rest of my life, and afterwards, my son will be more or less the same as he is now. I can't accept the pain of it. And the loss of it. I don't know why I fight it so. Love. [/QUOTE]
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