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Substance Abuse
The mystery..it's not good
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<blockquote data-quote="mommabear34" data-source="post: 706052" data-attributes="member: 21243"><p>Ok so it sounds like he either owes someone money or as Susie said he might be telling you that he is paying their rent but he is most likely getting something in return. No mystery there. Addicts are just very good at manipulation. Especially when it comes to their parents. Because you want so much to believe them. You want to think that it must be true, it has to be someone else influencing him to make these decisions... and so on... when does he turn 21? If something came up in his drug screening and he is capable of keeping a job couldn't he qualify for a sober living still?</p><p></p><p>I only ask because you mentioned that he's been in sober living before. And if he's living at home, with you and the rest of your family he potentially puts you and the other members of your household at risk. When my older brother was still living with my parents he owed money to some pretty bad people. They came looking for him at my parents home. It was scary. The police were involved. My parents felt they had to pay off his debts because they were afraid for his life... and for the lives of my other siblings and their own. It was awful. I'd like to say that it only happened that one time but it didn't. It happened several times. I think because my parents kept bailing him out. To be honest... I don't even know if he actually owed the last people the money or they were just scheming to get money for drugs... he did a lot of horrible things when he was in his addiction... it wasn't my brother anymore.</p><p></p><p> I'm not trying to scare you but just tell you my experience... because I would absolutely hate myself if I didn't say anything and then saw you post that the same thing happened to you as well. I truly wish you all the best... please know that you have people out here that support you and please try not to drive yourself crazy with the drama that comes with this lifestyle... it doesn't make sense to us and it never will... good luck with your son ❤</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mommabear34, post: 706052, member: 21243"] Ok so it sounds like he either owes someone money or as Susie said he might be telling you that he is paying their rent but he is most likely getting something in return. No mystery there. Addicts are just very good at manipulation. Especially when it comes to their parents. Because you want so much to believe them. You want to think that it must be true, it has to be someone else influencing him to make these decisions... and so on... when does he turn 21? If something came up in his drug screening and he is capable of keeping a job couldn't he qualify for a sober living still? I only ask because you mentioned that he's been in sober living before. And if he's living at home, with you and the rest of your family he potentially puts you and the other members of your household at risk. When my older brother was still living with my parents he owed money to some pretty bad people. They came looking for him at my parents home. It was scary. The police were involved. My parents felt they had to pay off his debts because they were afraid for his life... and for the lives of my other siblings and their own. It was awful. I'd like to say that it only happened that one time but it didn't. It happened several times. I think because my parents kept bailing him out. To be honest... I don't even know if he actually owed the last people the money or they were just scheming to get money for drugs... he did a lot of horrible things when he was in his addiction... it wasn't my brother anymore. I'm not trying to scare you but just tell you my experience... because I would absolutely hate myself if I didn't say anything and then saw you post that the same thing happened to you as well. I truly wish you all the best... please know that you have people out here that support you and please try not to drive yourself crazy with the drama that comes with this lifestyle... it doesn't make sense to us and it never will... good luck with your son ❤ [/QUOTE]
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The mystery..it's not good
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