Trying to have a Merry Christmas!

in a daze

Well-Known Member
Hi everyone.

My son got a bad work evaluation and is suspended for three days. The issues as I see it, are unmedicated ADHD, learning disability, possible sleep apnea, some substances at night, (he likes beer, hard lemonade, and kratom) and undermedicated anxiety. He is devastated. His self esteem is in the toilet.

I saw my therapist yesterday and went through a box of Kleenex. Today, I feel better.

He is, or was, getting some accommodations at work. It’s a long story.

My husband, who is usually very directive and questioning with him, has been very empathetic and listens to him instead of telling him what he should do, and I told him he was doing a good job in relating to our son.

So that’s what’s going on with us.

Happy Holidays!
 

Nomad

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Good you have a therapist. Good your husband was empathetic.

Probably best to focus heavily on what’s good. This is what seems to help. Especially at this time of year…but really always.

Best wishes. Sending good thoughts. Happy Holidays as well!!!!
 

Nandina

Member
In a Daze, this is a strange time for me with current issues involving my son.

But I’m hangin’ in here for my husband and other two kids. I know you will be there for your family as well.

I agree with Nomad. I also think your husband is doing something that a lot of fathers seem to have trouble with when dealing with their struggling adult children. I know my husband has had trouble in the past, He’s having to change, slowly.

I’m glad you praised him for it. Good for you.

I’ll take a deep breath with you and we’ll get through it along with anyone else who wants to join in.

Sending love and praying for peace for all of us, both inward and outward.
 

Acacia

Well-Known Member
It is hard not to feel our children's pain, but it's great your husband was able to be a support for your son. Glad to hear you have a place with your therapist to let the pain out.

I'm struggling also, but trying to enjoy the holidays to the best of my abilities.
Sending good energy.
 

RN0441

100% better than I was but not at 100% yet
In a Daze

Well your son still has a job and maybe he will learn a valuable lesson from whatever happened.

They just don't have the coping skills we wish they had or that we have.

Yes focus on the positives. This is just a bump in the road.

Happy Holidays!
 

in a daze

Well-Known Member
Hi everyone. Happy new year.

So my son’s therapist has dropped him, as he did not go to a group as he had agreed. They were doing Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, and they had a very strict contract.

My son says his anxiety keeps him from going.

Last week he tried to go to an AA meeting, but there was only one person there.

The next day he went to therapy, and therapist said he could not see him anymore, and was going to refer him out.

M was angry and walked out of the meeting.

Therapist hasn’t gotten back to him or me for over a week. He told me he was going to refer him out and sent out messages to other therapists.

He dismisses him right before he was to go back to work after the Christmas break/suspension.

He does this right before Christmas, takes two weeks off for a personal matter, and then abandons him just as he’s going back to work after the suspension.

I think he’s taking things too much by the book. I was so upset. Saw my therapist last week and went through another box of Kleenex 😞

M is doing better at work, up until today. I’ll tell u about that later.
 
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