Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Weird and continued roller coaster ride.
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 730010" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I was told long ago and believe that adult kids pick their SO over mom and dad every time. She loves this man. But she lies to get her way (I have a mood disorder and will never believe this is mania...it is more in my opinion just being who she is). But that is irrelevant. No matter why she treats you undeservedly badly.....she does it.</p><p></p><p>You can not put conditions on a 36 year old and expect to prevail. If you want to allow her to rent there and be as honest with you as she is capable of, you need to let him be there too or she will keep lying about him to you. Adults pick even flawed SO over us. We can't pick who they see.</p><p></p><p>Yes, you can put conditions on who is in your house. Wouldn't it be better anyway for her to move out and become independent? As long as she is in your property she is still not adulting and she is getting too old to depend on you like she does.</p><p></p><p>I believe that this man is cringeworthy, but your daughter makes her own choices...she picked him and she makes all her life choices es. He doesn't make them for her. I will give you a sad example from my own life.</p><p></p><p>My son, who we adopted at six, was never that attached to us, but he stuck around until he met a hot older woman who wanted him all for herself. He dumped everyone, except my ex who has a lot of money. Everyone e knows this was her idea, even ex. But Son CHOSE her influence over us. It was not her fault. She did not point a loaded gun to his head. He chose her over the family. HE did.</p><p></p><p>Your daughter is choosing her bad decisions. She doesn't have to stay with boyfriend or listen to him and her problems won't end if you push her into leaving him (if you can). She may even deeply resent you and make your relationship worse.</p><p></p><p>We can't control our adult kids even if we are sort of supporting them. We can stop supporting them but they usually still do what they want then start a huge hate compagne against us. The adults who bring us here are not exactly mature and fair....</p><p></p><p>I am sorry...so very sorry...for all the dreams that did not come true in your life. It's heartbreaking. Just offering some thoughts. Time for you to focus on YOU first, second and third! You matter and don't need to angst over an intelligent daughter who you gave EVERY advantage to and who is your daughters age and makes choices you don't agree with. How about making your life all about you? Sounds selfish but you have done nothing but give, give, give.</p><p></p><p>Today is the first day of the rest of your life. (I love this. It is true every time we awaken!)</p><p></p><p>Love and hugs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 730010, member: 1550"] I was told long ago and believe that adult kids pick their SO over mom and dad every time. She loves this man. But she lies to get her way (I have a mood disorder and will never believe this is mania...it is more in my opinion just being who she is). But that is irrelevant. No matter why she treats you undeservedly badly.....she does it. You can not put conditions on a 36 year old and expect to prevail. If you want to allow her to rent there and be as honest with you as she is capable of, you need to let him be there too or she will keep lying about him to you. Adults pick even flawed SO over us. We can't pick who they see. Yes, you can put conditions on who is in your house. Wouldn't it be better anyway for her to move out and become independent? As long as she is in your property she is still not adulting and she is getting too old to depend on you like she does. I believe that this man is cringeworthy, but your daughter makes her own choices...she picked him and she makes all her life choices es. He doesn't make them for her. I will give you a sad example from my own life. My son, who we adopted at six, was never that attached to us, but he stuck around until he met a hot older woman who wanted him all for herself. He dumped everyone, except my ex who has a lot of money. Everyone e knows this was her idea, even ex. But Son CHOSE her influence over us. It was not her fault. She did not point a loaded gun to his head. He chose her over the family. HE did. Your daughter is choosing her bad decisions. She doesn't have to stay with boyfriend or listen to him and her problems won't end if you push her into leaving him (if you can). She may even deeply resent you and make your relationship worse. We can't control our adult kids even if we are sort of supporting them. We can stop supporting them but they usually still do what they want then start a huge hate compagne against us. The adults who bring us here are not exactly mature and fair.... I am sorry...so very sorry...for all the dreams that did not come true in your life. It's heartbreaking. Just offering some thoughts. Time for you to focus on YOU first, second and third! You matter and don't need to angst over an intelligent daughter who you gave EVERY advantage to and who is your daughters age and makes choices you don't agree with. How about making your life all about you? Sounds selfish but you have done nothing but give, give, give. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. (I love this. It is true every time we awaken!) Love and hugs. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Weird and continued roller coaster ride.
Top