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Parent Emeritus
Weird and continued roller coaster ride.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 730023" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>NewStart I don't know how your precious, wonderful son was when he became an angel. I can tell you that although all of my grown kids want our approval that now that they are all totally grown, even if we didn't like a choice they made, such as a partner, they would be sorry about it but do what they wanted anyways. Very few adults continue to take our wants into consideration. It's not just your daughter. Grown kids rarely want to hang with even a beloved mom and dad. It happened with you and your mom, and that's a beautiful memory, but I think it's rare. Jumper, my youngest, is the only kid I see that often although I am close to all. Two live out of town. One is a love bug who lives nearby and we see him once a week but he has a form of autism and is not crazy about going out and doing things.</p><p></p><p>NewStart, I desperately want my kids to love me too. I never ever got that from my family of origin. I have no extended relatives on my side. I have a sister and brother. I wish I could be close to both. Instead it always makes me feel very disrespected, invalidated and sad to talk to my sister for any reason, and I dont think my brother wants anything to do with me unless I am close to my sister, so after my father's will is dispersed I don't expect to text either again. Of course, it is much worse to have this disconnect t with a daughter, no question about that, but I have a little bit of an understanding about how it feels to you, and I hurt for you so much. Again, I am not comparing my situation to yours. But I did once wish desperately, desperately that I could be loved for myself by family of origin. It once hurt me to my bones.</p><p></p><p>My mother disinherited me when she passed. She left me $1. I didn't care about the money. I cared about the rejection. I had apologized to her over and over even though she was horrid to me and refused to know my kids. And I wasn't even sure what I did to deserve her disdain but I was the family scapegoat and she either had borderline or bipolar or both.....</p><p></p><p>This is not about me. It's just a relief to finally be able to talk about my mother knowing that I never have to defend what I say about her and remember about her to anyone again.</p><p></p><p>I am sorry. I did not mean to steal your thread.</p><p></p><p>I hope you can find the peace you seek. I did. It is possible for you to be happy. Yes. It is. You have been through so much but where there is life, there is hope. Try to trust the Universe....</p><p></p><p>My husband and I plan to RV snowbird next year. Maybe you and your very dear hub can start doing amazing things together! You both deserve much happiness. Be Honeymooners again. Date again. It's fun to do! I don't know if you believe this but I FEEL my passed loved ones with me. It's eerie. If you do too then you know your son is still watching you.</p><p></p><p>Love and hugs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 730023, member: 1550"] NewStart I don't know how your precious, wonderful son was when he became an angel. I can tell you that although all of my grown kids want our approval that now that they are all totally grown, even if we didn't like a choice they made, such as a partner, they would be sorry about it but do what they wanted anyways. Very few adults continue to take our wants into consideration. It's not just your daughter. Grown kids rarely want to hang with even a beloved mom and dad. It happened with you and your mom, and that's a beautiful memory, but I think it's rare. Jumper, my youngest, is the only kid I see that often although I am close to all. Two live out of town. One is a love bug who lives nearby and we see him once a week but he has a form of autism and is not crazy about going out and doing things. NewStart, I desperately want my kids to love me too. I never ever got that from my family of origin. I have no extended relatives on my side. I have a sister and brother. I wish I could be close to both. Instead it always makes me feel very disrespected, invalidated and sad to talk to my sister for any reason, and I dont think my brother wants anything to do with me unless I am close to my sister, so after my father's will is dispersed I don't expect to text either again. Of course, it is much worse to have this disconnect t with a daughter, no question about that, but I have a little bit of an understanding about how it feels to you, and I hurt for you so much. Again, I am not comparing my situation to yours. But I did once wish desperately, desperately that I could be loved for myself by family of origin. It once hurt me to my bones. My mother disinherited me when she passed. She left me $1. I didn't care about the money. I cared about the rejection. I had apologized to her over and over even though she was horrid to me and refused to know my kids. And I wasn't even sure what I did to deserve her disdain but I was the family scapegoat and she either had borderline or bipolar or both..... This is not about me. It's just a relief to finally be able to talk about my mother knowing that I never have to defend what I say about her and remember about her to anyone again. I am sorry. I did not mean to steal your thread. I hope you can find the peace you seek. I did. It is possible for you to be happy. Yes. It is. You have been through so much but where there is life, there is hope. Try to trust the Universe.... My husband and I plan to RV snowbird next year. Maybe you and your very dear hub can start doing amazing things together! You both deserve much happiness. Be Honeymooners again. Date again. It's fun to do! I don't know if you believe this but I FEEL my passed loved ones with me. It's eerie. If you do too then you know your son is still watching you. Love and hugs. [/QUOTE]
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