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General Discussions
Family of Origin
What is your relationship like with your 1st cousins?
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 737516" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I have no real relationship with any cousins.</p><p></p><p>One cousin lives in my town. We bump into each other at Costco. It is awkward. Last time she did not recognize me. I told myself it was because I had aged so much. We do make small talk about the family. She has no interest in me and I feel inferior to her. She is a mover and shaker. I am an interloper. And weird to boot.</p><p></p><p>It has been 25 years to 40 years since I saw cousins on my maternal side.</p><p></p><p>There was so much trauma and division for me the normal state is running away.</p><p></p><p>But that is what I do.</p><p></p><p>I feel nothing in common with any of them. Why should I deny what I feel?</p><p></p><p>Sometimes I think about contacting the maternal cousins, to basically ask how was your life, and to affirm the connection at least. To say I am sorry and I wish it had been different.</p><p></p><p>Maybe I will. Thank you wish.</p><p></p><p>Miguel is different than me. He may run away but he is always mending, restoring, affirming family relationships. Even from afar. I think thats a good way to be. I respect that.</p><p></p><p>But I don't feel strong enough. I am vulnerable. I don't want to be hurt. To him, there is no risk.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 737516, member: 18958"] I have no real relationship with any cousins. One cousin lives in my town. We bump into each other at Costco. It is awkward. Last time she did not recognize me. I told myself it was because I had aged so much. We do make small talk about the family. She has no interest in me and I feel inferior to her. She is a mover and shaker. I am an interloper. And weird to boot. It has been 25 years to 40 years since I saw cousins on my maternal side. There was so much trauma and division for me the normal state is running away. But that is what I do. I feel nothing in common with any of them. Why should I deny what I feel? Sometimes I think about contacting the maternal cousins, to basically ask how was your life, and to affirm the connection at least. To say I am sorry and I wish it had been different. Maybe I will. Thank you wish. Miguel is different than me. He may run away but he is always mending, restoring, affirming family relationships. Even from afar. I think thats a good way to be. I respect that. But I don't feel strong enough. I am vulnerable. I don't want to be hurt. To him, there is no risk. [/QUOTE]
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What is your relationship like with your 1st cousins?
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