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10 Days Since I Kicked him out - so far so good.
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 664460" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Sea genie, right now you are in a new transition so do what works for you. I went for periods of time without talking to Difficult Child and it was good for me. I needed to regain my equilibrium. Then, I went through a period when I just wanted to know he was alive and I could be okay once I saw activity on his Facebook account or even that he had been online hours before. I truly didn't want to talk to him or know anything about his life at all. Those periods were restorative for me.</p><p></p><p>Often I would be very angry or sad or just filled with despair after he and I would talk or I would see him. I started seeing much more clearly that I needed to refocus my energy on myself instead of it all being on him and completely disregarding my own needs. That was a major shift for me and it has lasted now for a couple of years. I have broken the strings that were way way too tight between he and I and I believe that is one big reason he is now turning around and starting to rely more on himself. </p><p></p><p>He can change. Things can change. In the meantime, do what you need. YOU. </p><p></p><p>We are here for you. We understand.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 664460, member: 17542"] Sea genie, right now you are in a new transition so do what works for you. I went for periods of time without talking to Difficult Child and it was good for me. I needed to regain my equilibrium. Then, I went through a period when I just wanted to know he was alive and I could be okay once I saw activity on his Facebook account or even that he had been online hours before. I truly didn't want to talk to him or know anything about his life at all. Those periods were restorative for me. Often I would be very angry or sad or just filled with despair after he and I would talk or I would see him. I started seeing much more clearly that I needed to refocus my energy on myself instead of it all being on him and completely disregarding my own needs. That was a major shift for me and it has lasted now for a couple of years. I have broken the strings that were way way too tight between he and I and I believe that is one big reason he is now turning around and starting to rely more on himself. He can change. Things can change. In the meantime, do what you need. YOU. We are here for you. We understand. [/QUOTE]
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10 Days Since I Kicked him out - so far so good.
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