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15 going on 16 "daughter" - Help!!
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<blockquote data-quote="Sleepless_&amp;_Distraught" data-source="post: 697149" data-attributes="member: 20641"><p>Elsa's mother has been very grateful for my assistance & help the past 8 years. The parents as I said earlier are not strong disciplinarians. </p><p>There are no legal issues - and the mother has been appreciative for all I have done for Elsa... </p><p>This is why I wrote for advice.</p><p>Me taking the the cell phone away (which we have discussed as a consequence of disrespectful behavior) is because the parents are not assertive enough to do so... </p><p>You can't spank a child in today's society, and especially at Elsa's age. Elsa's mom gets very afraid. She just wants peace in the house.</p><p></p><p>I can step aside, and exit this picture. I don't care about losing the money for the charitable group... it goes to charity... but my parents have lasted 56 years -- not because life is a bowl of cherries, but because they were committed to the relationship. People will always let you down... part of being human - but because someone made a mistake is that cause to walk away disregarding the past years of history together? </p><p>At my home it's been war & peace... but the good has outweighed the bad. Recently, my father had a right brain stroke during a knee replacement (3 yrs now). How life changes... and although my father's moods and frustration have elevated his anxiety & he has literal outbursts of temper - we don't give up on him. We love him through these struggles he's dealing with as hard sometimes as it is. We don't throw him away. We keep looking for the right medicine, talking with different doctors. Always keeping hope... believing in the end that Love cures all things.</p><p></p><p>I hate discarding Elsa, walking away, even though her mother understands and has told me it is okay to pull my love & being there, not only for Elsa, but for the whole family.</p><p>Am I richer in my spirit for knowing this young woman, indeed I am. Will I miss doing good within the community with her, yes, I will. I have never believed in divorce unless the other person's life is at risk as in an abusive relationship. </p><p>Maybe I come from a different world. </p><p>But if she wants to be grown up making life altering choices for better or for worse because at 15, she knows it all... and as Taylor Swift said in her song called "15" ... 'when someone tells you they love you, you're going to believe them... you are '15.'</p><p>I guess it is better for me to withdraw. </p><p></p><p>Thank you to those who replied. </p><p>It's a death (figuratively speaking metarphorically). I'll grieve. </p><p>Life goes on.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sleepless_&_Distraught, post: 697149, member: 20641"] Elsa's mother has been very grateful for my assistance & help the past 8 years. The parents as I said earlier are not strong disciplinarians. There are no legal issues - and the mother has been appreciative for all I have done for Elsa... This is why I wrote for advice. Me taking the the cell phone away (which we have discussed as a consequence of disrespectful behavior) is because the parents are not assertive enough to do so... You can't spank a child in today's society, and especially at Elsa's age. Elsa's mom gets very afraid. She just wants peace in the house. I can step aside, and exit this picture. I don't care about losing the money for the charitable group... it goes to charity... but my parents have lasted 56 years -- not because life is a bowl of cherries, but because they were committed to the relationship. People will always let you down... part of being human - but because someone made a mistake is that cause to walk away disregarding the past years of history together? At my home it's been war & peace... but the good has outweighed the bad. Recently, my father had a right brain stroke during a knee replacement (3 yrs now). How life changes... and although my father's moods and frustration have elevated his anxiety & he has literal outbursts of temper - we don't give up on him. We love him through these struggles he's dealing with as hard sometimes as it is. We don't throw him away. We keep looking for the right medicine, talking with different doctors. Always keeping hope... believing in the end that Love cures all things. I hate discarding Elsa, walking away, even though her mother understands and has told me it is okay to pull my love & being there, not only for Elsa, but for the whole family. Am I richer in my spirit for knowing this young woman, indeed I am. Will I miss doing good within the community with her, yes, I will. I have never believed in divorce unless the other person's life is at risk as in an abusive relationship. Maybe I come from a different world. But if she wants to be grown up making life altering choices for better or for worse because at 15, she knows it all... and as Taylor Swift said in her song called "15" ... 'when someone tells you they love you, you're going to believe them... you are '15.' I guess it is better for me to withdraw. Thank you to those who replied. It's a death (figuratively speaking metarphorically). I'll grieve. Life goes on. [/QUOTE]
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