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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 766002" data-attributes="member: 18958">Hi BetaI have been thinking and thinking about your post. You know my son is adopted, too.&nbsp; I have been thinking about regret. Of course, I regret all of the suffering I've had these many years. Of course, I regret that my son is homeless and manipulative and can't function in a way that is normal or sufficient. Of course, I regret his suffering. But, do I regret adopting him? Do I regret the many years of loving happiness we had? No. &nbsp;My life, would not have been my life, had I not adopted my son.&nbsp; Also, I don't rule out that my son still has a chance to change the course of his life. Had he not had the formative years with a loving parent, would he have had that possibility? I don't think so.I knew my son had struggles and problems when I brought him home. My error was to believe my love could combat them. That was a fantasy. I don't know if I am lying to myself. Who would not have wanted to have effort, hope, and love result in happiness and pride? That still does not change what I feel. I don't regret my life. We did our very best. Life does not guarantee a result. Life does not always reward effort. But I believe intention and goodness are rewarded and they are their own reward.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 766002, member: 18958"] Hi Beta I have been thinking and thinking about your post. You know my son is adopted, too. I have been thinking about regret. Of course, I regret all of the suffering I've had these many years. Of course, I regret that my son is homeless and manipulative and can't function in a way that is normal or sufficient. Of course, I regret his suffering. But, do I regret adopting him? Do I regret the many years of loving happiness we had? No. My life, would not have been my life, had I not adopted my son. Also, I don't rule out that my son still has a chance to change the course of his life. Had he not had the formative years with a loving parent, would he have had that possibility? I don't think so. I knew my son had struggles and problems when I brought him home. My error was to believe my love could combat them. That was a fantasy. I don't know if I am lying to myself. Who would not have wanted to have effort, hope, and love result in happiness and pride? That still does not change what I feel. I don't regret my life. We did our very best. Life does not guarantee a result. Life does not always reward effort. But I believe intention and goodness are rewarded and they are their own reward. [/QUOTE]

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