Recoveringenabler, Your words once again touched my heart. I have had such a hard time with the lastest BS my daughter has caused. I was so miserable yesterday. I was walking in the sunlight and trying hard to enjoy the day and then a wave over took me and tears were falling. I know some of this is depression and most of it is from spending a few minutes around my toxic daughter and her toxic boyfriend. Even less than 5 minutes around them is sometimes too much.
I am learning to let go...After my son died I had to learn to let go of him. Took me a long time, he is in my heart. Letting go of a person that is alive is really difficult for me since family means everything to me. Family connection is the most important thing in my life but I have to realize not everyone feels this way.
I can't get that image of Reggie, the mother of the serial killer out of my mind. Her words and pain in her face were so raw and real. I wish there was someone or something that could have helped her with that intense of pain but as we all know pain from our children is on such a high level. I have been in this battle for many years but still feel I do not know what to do. I am feeling my way around, if it feels right I will do it.
Thank you for your compassion, I appreciate you very much.
