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Substance Abuse
7 months on...i'm back
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<blockquote data-quote="beebz" data-source="post: 749717" data-attributes="member: 23451"><p>I almost hate to do this, it has been done and said to me, its is hard all the way around.</p><p></p><p>But my comment is, "how long do YOU want to do this"? YOU, not your son, YOU.</p><p></p><p>I've done it for 20 years, the girlfriends moving in (sob story) the wife moving in (sob story) the whole family moving in (2 daughters plus parents), co-signing, lending 10's of thousands of dollars, drugs, there is so much more. I was a huge part of the problem. I was the biggest enabler and didn't really know it. I called it "love".</p><p></p><p>Anyhow, I am 57 now, the homeless addict is 34 - its been 20 years starting with "weed". NOTHING has changed, nothing, except I am older, more broke financially, broken as a human, broken as a mother etc.</p><p></p><p>I have finally taken my life back, mostly, no one has lived here in a LONG time. I let them visit when it is 7 degrees outside but I swiftly kick them out and give them a ride, dump them off and don't look back. Of course I cry all the way home. But this must be done. I do share custody of the grand daughters which is just fine and dandy. Its not their fault, they are innocent and as a grandma I have more patience and enjoy sitting and laughing at their silliness and sitting in utter amazement at their intelligence. </p><p></p><p>Keep reading. Think of yourself - you are ALLOWED to think of yourself and you better before it is too late. I was consumed and unable to function and fall back into that place often. Read, pray, hope and faith will help you go day to day; actually moment to moment. Be well, be safe and you would not be wrong to think of yourself - do it - ~warmly - ~beebz</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="beebz, post: 749717, member: 23451"] I almost hate to do this, it has been done and said to me, its is hard all the way around. But my comment is, "how long do YOU want to do this"? YOU, not your son, YOU. I've done it for 20 years, the girlfriends moving in (sob story) the wife moving in (sob story) the whole family moving in (2 daughters plus parents), co-signing, lending 10's of thousands of dollars, drugs, there is so much more. I was a huge part of the problem. I was the biggest enabler and didn't really know it. I called it "love". Anyhow, I am 57 now, the homeless addict is 34 - its been 20 years starting with "weed". NOTHING has changed, nothing, except I am older, more broke financially, broken as a human, broken as a mother etc. I have finally taken my life back, mostly, no one has lived here in a LONG time. I let them visit when it is 7 degrees outside but I swiftly kick them out and give them a ride, dump them off and don't look back. Of course I cry all the way home. But this must be done. I do share custody of the grand daughters which is just fine and dandy. Its not their fault, they are innocent and as a grandma I have more patience and enjoy sitting and laughing at their silliness and sitting in utter amazement at their intelligence. Keep reading. Think of yourself - you are ALLOWED to think of yourself and you better before it is too late. I was consumed and unable to function and fall back into that place often. Read, pray, hope and faith will help you go day to day; actually moment to moment. Be well, be safe and you would not be wrong to think of yourself - do it - ~warmly - ~beebz [/QUOTE]
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7 months on...i'm back
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