I was going to say the same thing: stop doing for him and take care of you. Don't look for a place for him. Just tell him he has to be out by whatever day you chose.
I recently told my son that I am backing off. That is all I told him but what I mean is no more advice, suggestions, questions. Unless he specifically asks for advice, there will be none .I have not made a single suggestion for job searches, I no longer say anything about the test he needs to take for grad school. It's all his business . And I am busy tending to my business . He told me this morning he has looked into the test, he is applying to better suited jobs (instead of gas stations with a college degree) , and I just encourage. "Good for you", "That makes sense", "I see", "You may be right". I have stopped telling my stories , relating my life's experience, having a hidden agenda of getting him to see things my way. It was my own self-centered that was in the way . Once I realized I wanted him to change to eleviate my fears , and I saw how selfish that is, I was able to surrender. He will figure it out .every mistake he makes will lead to corrections for him.
