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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 695808" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>The resentment he feels is his alone to own. There was a time that I too struggled with "how can I be happy when my son's life is spiraling out of control" Our lives should not be put on hold just because our adult children are having issues.</p><p>I remember when I decided that I was going to live my life and seek happiness regardless of my son's chaos. I shared with my son that hubby and I were going to the Caribbean for a vacation. His response was something to the effect of "fine, go off and have a good time while I rot here in jail" Oh he was resentful alright. I let it bother me for a little bit and my husband set me straight. I have worked hard all my life, I follow the rules, go to work everyday, pay my bills, etc..... I deserve to take a vacation any time I choose and if my son doesn't like it, well that's his to own. I will not allow his pity party's to draw me into those feelings of guilt.</p><p>My son is miserable and he wants me to be miserable with him. I refuse. I will continue to live my life to fullest. I also do not tell my son if hubby and I are vacationing as it really is none of his business.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Silly Alaska, of course they blame you - it's right there in the Adult Difficult Child handbook on page 87 "BLAME YOUR MOTHER"</p><p>Seriously, they blame us because then they don't have to own up to and take responsibility for the poor choices they have made.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 695808, member: 18516"] The resentment he feels is his alone to own. There was a time that I too struggled with "how can I be happy when my son's life is spiraling out of control" Our lives should not be put on hold just because our adult children are having issues. I remember when I decided that I was going to live my life and seek happiness regardless of my son's chaos. I shared with my son that hubby and I were going to the Caribbean for a vacation. His response was something to the effect of "fine, go off and have a good time while I rot here in jail" Oh he was resentful alright. I let it bother me for a little bit and my husband set me straight. I have worked hard all my life, I follow the rules, go to work everyday, pay my bills, etc..... I deserve to take a vacation any time I choose and if my son doesn't like it, well that's his to own. I will not allow his pity party's to draw me into those feelings of guilt. My son is miserable and he wants me to be miserable with him. I refuse. I will continue to live my life to fullest. I also do not tell my son if hubby and I are vacationing as it really is none of his business. Silly Alaska, of course they blame you - it's right there in the Adult Difficult Child handbook on page 87 "BLAME YOUR MOTHER" Seriously, they blame us because then they don't have to own up to and take responsibility for the poor choices they have made. [/QUOTE]
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