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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 740399" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Many hugs to you Leafy.</p><p></p><p>Wherever Tornado is right now, she cannot change the fact that she was just released from jail where she's been for a number of weeks AND she will have to go to court and deal with whatever fallout still remains. Life has changed for her, what she does with that change is up to her. You, on the other hand, have learned a lot..... you've worked through your distress, you utilized your tool box to your advantage, you asked for support, you had a very tender, heartfelt moment with Rain, you and Tornado have had communications where you gained knowledge about her present state of mind, you kept your promise to your son and continued with your own life, you chose to keep the connections with both daughter's intact while you worked through how to accept this new information, you remained loving and kind while still holding your boundaries intact........and you continued on your life's journey, with compassion, empathy, strength and courage. You were able to "change the channel." </p><p></p><p>We parents move through these life events battered, beat up and overwhelmed with horrors..... and when we land on the other side, we simply brush ourselves off and go back in the fray to handle the next avalanche of "stuff." Take a moment Leafy to acknowledge how far you've come, how well you handled this issue with Tornado, how you kept your heart open and at the same time kept your boundaries intact, a remarkable balancing act of self love & love & compassion for self and others. The journey through matters, how you handled this matters, that deserves acknowledgment & validation......your response was stellar. The rest is up to Tornado. </p><p></p><p>Perhaps do something kind and nurturing for yourself......you've been through an emotional upheaval.....reward yourself Leafy for a job well done......we need to do that for ourselves.....you did a good job Leafy, your usual grace under pressure.....focus on that.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 740399, member: 13542"] Many hugs to you Leafy. Wherever Tornado is right now, she cannot change the fact that she was just released from jail where she's been for a number of weeks AND she will have to go to court and deal with whatever fallout still remains. Life has changed for her, what she does with that change is up to her. You, on the other hand, have learned a lot..... you've worked through your distress, you utilized your tool box to your advantage, you asked for support, you had a very tender, heartfelt moment with Rain, you and Tornado have had communications where you gained knowledge about her present state of mind, you kept your promise to your son and continued with your own life, you chose to keep the connections with both daughter's intact while you worked through how to accept this new information, you remained loving and kind while still holding your boundaries intact........and you continued on your life's journey, with compassion, empathy, strength and courage. You were able to "change the channel." We parents move through these life events battered, beat up and overwhelmed with horrors..... and when we land on the other side, we simply brush ourselves off and go back in the fray to handle the next avalanche of "stuff." Take a moment Leafy to acknowledge how far you've come, how well you handled this issue with Tornado, how you kept your heart open and at the same time kept your boundaries intact, a remarkable balancing act of self love & love & compassion for self and others. The journey through matters, how you handled this matters, that deserves acknowledgment & validation......your response was stellar. The rest is up to Tornado. Perhaps do something kind and nurturing for yourself......you've been through an emotional upheaval.....reward yourself Leafy for a job well done......we need to do that for ourselves.....you did a good job Leafy, your usual grace under pressure.....focus on that. [/QUOTE]
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