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A tough question to answer ...
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 740550" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Yes.</p><p>I must be agitated. I do know how to spell piece.</p><p>SWOT would say the illness does not preclude their responsibility. And when you think about it, it is patronizing and enabling to try to protect somebody from their lives. These adults in our lives are not incapable of choosing better for themselves. To insulate them by our over-protectiveness and fear is to deprive them of their right to choose and to define their lives. </p><p></p><p>In my own case my son is eligible for services that he does not access IF I HELP HIM.</p><p> I think the key is the latter part of this sentence. The Work.</p><p></p><p>My son WANTS to feel better. He does not have the vision of being better. Which is partly a manifestation of his illness, and partly circular, in that if he had a vision of improving his life in a doable way, he would have to do it.</p><p>Work towards it.</p><p></p><p>Even getting his drivers license back, my son will not do. It is like somebody shot him with a stun gun. He will not move to improve his life. </p><p></p><p>But it is not that he has been rendered paralyzed by some outside agent. It is that he feels paralyzed. Or maybe the better word is numb. He has sought out numbness, as his preferred lifestyle.</p><p></p><p>Now he is homeless. There is no safe place. There is no hope of comfort to rescue him from that place. He is left with himself. He will have to do something. Either dig himself deeper or dig himself out. I do not see how he keeps going as he is.</p><p></p><p>He has always insisted he would not do hard drugs or IV drugs. That has always been his bottom line. Every time he is homeless he comes back with worse habits. But his insistence that there was a line beyond which he would not let himself fall, has given me a bit of reassurance. That if he had the ego strength to maintain this line, there was hope.</p><p></p><p>One day at a time.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 740550, member: 18958"] Yes. I must be agitated. I do know how to spell piece. SWOT would say the illness does not preclude their responsibility. And when you think about it, it is patronizing and enabling to try to protect somebody from their lives. These adults in our lives are not incapable of choosing better for themselves. To insulate them by our over-protectiveness and fear is to deprive them of their right to choose and to define their lives. In my own case my son is eligible for services that he does not access IF I HELP HIM. I think the key is the latter part of this sentence. The Work. My son WANTS to feel better. He does not have the vision of being better. Which is partly a manifestation of his illness, and partly circular, in that if he had a vision of improving his life in a doable way, he would have to do it. Work towards it. Even getting his drivers license back, my son will not do. It is like somebody shot him with a stun gun. He will not move to improve his life. But it is not that he has been rendered paralyzed by some outside agent. It is that he feels paralyzed. Or maybe the better word is numb. He has sought out numbness, as his preferred lifestyle. Now he is homeless. There is no safe place. There is no hope of comfort to rescue him from that place. He is left with himself. He will have to do something. Either dig himself deeper or dig himself out. I do not see how he keeps going as he is. He has always insisted he would not do hard drugs or IV drugs. That has always been his bottom line. Every time he is homeless he comes back with worse habits. But his insistence that there was a line beyond which he would not let himself fall, has given me a bit of reassurance. That if he had the ego strength to maintain this line, there was hope. One day at a time. [/QUOTE]
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