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Parent Emeritus
A visit from my son
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<blockquote data-quote="Elsi" data-source="post: 739719" data-attributes="member: 23349"><p>Joy I am right there with you. It’s so hard to know when to throw them a lifeline and when to let them sink or swim on their own. We want so much to believe in them every time they are making steps towards sobriety. We don’t want to fail to help when there is a chance that this time they are sincere and ready. </p><p></p><p>I think we have to stay a few steps removed as they go through this. Watch, wait and see if they follow through. I am also feeling myself getting sucked too far back in. It’s hard not to. I think we have to find ways of showing support and love that don’t shift the responsibility for their recovery back on us. They have to do it. We can help with encouragement, an occasional meal, other small things that don’t put our security or finances at risk and don’t give them resources they can spend on drugs or alcohol. I’m trying to find that balance too. I’m trying to find that middle road - maintaining my boundaries without turning my back on him entirely, and showing him a path back towards the light without entering the darkness with him. It’s hard.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Elsi, post: 739719, member: 23349"] Joy I am right there with you. It’s so hard to know when to throw them a lifeline and when to let them sink or swim on their own. We want so much to believe in them every time they are making steps towards sobriety. We don’t want to fail to help when there is a chance that this time they are sincere and ready. I think we have to stay a few steps removed as they go through this. Watch, wait and see if they follow through. I am also feeling myself getting sucked too far back in. It’s hard not to. I think we have to find ways of showing support and love that don’t shift the responsibility for their recovery back on us. They have to do it. We can help with encouragement, an occasional meal, other small things that don’t put our security or finances at risk and don’t give them resources they can spend on drugs or alcohol. I’m trying to find that balance too. I’m trying to find that middle road - maintaining my boundaries without turning my back on him entirely, and showing him a path back towards the light without entering the darkness with him. It’s hard. [/QUOTE]
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A visit from my son
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