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Advice on my 30 year old son
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<blockquote data-quote="Worriedmumalways" data-source="post: 747734" data-attributes="member: 23755"><p>Hi everyone - I have a 30 year old son in a situation (of his own making) that I just don’t know what to do about. All his working life he’s gone from one job to the other, never sticking to anything. To cut a long story short he has had 2 relationships, both failed miserably, but have left me with 3 Grandchildren (none of which he pays for). When he was living with us he was in huge debt not bothering to pay any of it, and when his last relationship failed leaving 2 children, his ex wouldn’t allow him to work at weekends because he “had to have the children, and if he didn’t have them it would mean he didn’t love them”. He was in Real Estate at the time so working weekends was essential. We made a decision as a family for him to move to another country and try to get his life in order, and gave him $8,000 to do it. He started brilliantly getting a job straight away and getting a lovely apartment. He lies to me a lot, so I thought that things were going brilliantly for him, until I got a text out of the blue simply saying “I’m struggling”. It turns out he got the sack from his job and can’t pay his rent. He says he is applying for jobs every day and getting interviews but is not getting work. As he is in another country he can’t get any help money wise and wouldn’t be able to afford any health care. He has had mental issues in the past and took an overdose once. I have his eldest daughter living with me as her Mother is in an abusive relationship, and I get no monetary help for her, therefore cannot, and will not send him any more money. </p><p></p><p></p><p>I am battling with myself, half of me strong and saying you’ve made your bed lie in it, and the other, worrying myself to death about it all, as after all he is my son and I love him.</p><p></p><p></p><p>I just don’t know what to do. Any advice?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Worriedmumalways, post: 747734, member: 23755"] Hi everyone - I have a 30 year old son in a situation (of his own making) that I just don’t know what to do about. All his working life he’s gone from one job to the other, never sticking to anything. To cut a long story short he has had 2 relationships, both failed miserably, but have left me with 3 Grandchildren (none of which he pays for). When he was living with us he was in huge debt not bothering to pay any of it, and when his last relationship failed leaving 2 children, his ex wouldn’t allow him to work at weekends because he “had to have the children, and if he didn’t have them it would mean he didn’t love them”. He was in Real Estate at the time so working weekends was essential. We made a decision as a family for him to move to another country and try to get his life in order, and gave him $8,000 to do it. He started brilliantly getting a job straight away and getting a lovely apartment. He lies to me a lot, so I thought that things were going brilliantly for him, until I got a text out of the blue simply saying “I’m struggling”. It turns out he got the sack from his job and can’t pay his rent. He says he is applying for jobs every day and getting interviews but is not getting work. As he is in another country he can’t get any help money wise and wouldn’t be able to afford any health care. He has had mental issues in the past and took an overdose once. I have his eldest daughter living with me as her Mother is in an abusive relationship, and I get no monetary help for her, therefore cannot, and will not send him any more money. I am battling with myself, half of me strong and saying you’ve made your bed lie in it, and the other, worrying myself to death about it all, as after all he is my son and I love him. I just don’t know what to do. Any advice? [/QUOTE]
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