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After Narcissistic Abuse Link
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 680117" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I will end here the above post. M said something the exact words elude me. it must have been a good and soothing couple of words because I felt better and still do. I think he said, go do something and think something to value yourself and we will find ways to do so together. it is not true you do not think or feel you have value. if you had not thought so you would not have bought stuff.</p><p></p><p>i had thought these last few days that i had bought to see how cheaply my mother held me that she could have valued stuff so much higher than me, or traded my welfare for such a thing as money and stuff. I worried, that maybe by buying I had to degrade my value, and to undermine my security to make her implicit assessment, which she had determined me to be, by her priorities and her acts. I feared that I had to take over myself, this same sense of undoing, unloading, depreciating, thoughtlessly and colpulsively.</p><p></p><p>I do not. while it is perplexing and painful to me how somebody intrinsically valuable could be overlooked and seemingly willfully diminished and degraded, I can choose to find value and build value. By choosing.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 680117, member: 18958"] I will end here the above post. M said something the exact words elude me. it must have been a good and soothing couple of words because I felt better and still do. I think he said, go do something and think something to value yourself and we will find ways to do so together. it is not true you do not think or feel you have value. if you had not thought so you would not have bought stuff. i had thought these last few days that i had bought to see how cheaply my mother held me that she could have valued stuff so much higher than me, or traded my welfare for such a thing as money and stuff. I worried, that maybe by buying I had to degrade my value, and to undermine my security to make her implicit assessment, which she had determined me to be, by her priorities and her acts. I feared that I had to take over myself, this same sense of undoing, unloading, depreciating, thoughtlessly and colpulsively. I do not. while it is perplexing and painful to me how somebody intrinsically valuable could be overlooked and seemingly willfully diminished and degraded, I can choose to find value and build value. By choosing. [/QUOTE]
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