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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 721687" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Checking in with you BBU, how're you doing? I hope you were able to find some solace with your family over the weekend.</p><p></p><p>I'm reading along with the progress YS is making......as well as the dysfunctional reactions your wife and her family have. You sound clear and resolved about the issues facing everyone around you......I understand first hand what you're going thru......you're in a tough spot but your clarity about the situation and your own sense of your value and well being will get you thru. </p><p></p><p>When I was in the midst of that level of dysfunction...... rage and seething blame around the suicide of my son-in-law, over time I reconciled within myself that without kindness, compassion and empathy I was no longer willing to participate in those connections. As I let go of those connections and their commitment to negativity and blame, the kind of folks who utilize that behavior as their main reaction fell away from my life. That level of blowup was enough for me to see the truth.....it opened my eyes and paved the way for that kindness, compassion and empathy to arrive at my door.</p><p></p><p>Blame is a way to discharge the intense energy that the situation brings up, but it is not appropriate or healthy in loving relationships. Continue to take care of yourself.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 721687, member: 13542"] Checking in with you BBU, how're you doing? I hope you were able to find some solace with your family over the weekend. I'm reading along with the progress YS is making......as well as the dysfunctional reactions your wife and her family have. You sound clear and resolved about the issues facing everyone around you......I understand first hand what you're going thru......you're in a tough spot but your clarity about the situation and your own sense of your value and well being will get you thru. When I was in the midst of that level of dysfunction...... rage and seething blame around the suicide of my son-in-law, over time I reconciled within myself that without kindness, compassion and empathy I was no longer willing to participate in those connections. As I let go of those connections and their commitment to negativity and blame, the kind of folks who utilize that behavior as their main reaction fell away from my life. That level of blowup was enough for me to see the truth.....it opened my eyes and paved the way for that kindness, compassion and empathy to arrive at my door. Blame is a way to discharge the intense energy that the situation brings up, but it is not appropriate or healthy in loving relationships. Continue to take care of yourself. [/QUOTE]
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