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Alcoholic Adult Son Homeless
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 760525" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Dear JC.</p><p></p><p>If this is your real name, I would change it.</p><p></p><p>I had a beautiful boy too. He looked like an angel. I could have written most of your post. All of the things you tried, I did too. The downward spiral of my now 32-year-old son and my own reaction to it are much the same as your own.. I have been on this forum for 6 years.</p><p></p><p>My son has worsened greatly in the time I have been here. When I started out here, I was so desperate I wanted to enroll in college classes with my son so that I could be sure he was attending and doing his work. Now he is flat-out homeless unless I house him. His drug use is way, way worse, in volume, type, and the way that they dominate his life and personality.</p><p></p><p>While I stopped trying to micro-manage, I have continued trying to help my son with housing. In one way or another, I have not let go of "conditions" even though they have never worked, and I knew they wouldn't. It's just that I have never been able to stop helping him. Even though I am aware that what I am helping is his addiction.</p><p></p><p>My son is mentally ill and he has a potentially fatal illness, for which he does not get treatment or monitoring. While I can point to these factors as fueling my anxiety, fear, confusion, and concern, it's really only part of it. I have lots of interests and meaning in my life. I have had a successful and satisfying life, but my life is really only my son. He is my love.</p><p></p><p>But the thing is, the reality is he is an addict and homeless. I love a child who is no longer there. There is a quote I saw a few days ago. I am going to go right now and find it because it fits here.</p><p></p><p>I will post it right below. Meanwhile welcome to you. I know with all my heart how you are suffering. It does get better. I can recover myself now. My son left yesterday, a property I own. I made him leave. He is bitter and rejecting. He blames me for everything. Helping him never works.. I haven't been able to stop. I love him. I keep believing there is a chance. But the thing is, I have no control over his "chances." Only he does.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 760525, member: 18958"] Dear JC. If this is your real name, I would change it. I had a beautiful boy too. He looked like an angel. I could have written most of your post. All of the things you tried, I did too. The downward spiral of my now 32-year-old son and my own reaction to it are much the same as your own.. I have been on this forum for 6 years. My son has worsened greatly in the time I have been here. When I started out here, I was so desperate I wanted to enroll in college classes with my son so that I could be sure he was attending and doing his work. Now he is flat-out homeless unless I house him. His drug use is way, way worse, in volume, type, and the way that they dominate his life and personality. While I stopped trying to micro-manage, I have continued trying to help my son with housing. In one way or another, I have not let go of "conditions" even though they have never worked, and I knew they wouldn't. It's just that I have never been able to stop helping him. Even though I am aware that what I am helping is his addiction. My son is mentally ill and he has a potentially fatal illness, for which he does not get treatment or monitoring. While I can point to these factors as fueling my anxiety, fear, confusion, and concern, it's really only part of it. I have lots of interests and meaning in my life. I have had a successful and satisfying life, but my life is really only my son. He is my love. But the thing is, the reality is he is an addict and homeless. I love a child who is no longer there. There is a quote I saw a few days ago. I am going to go right now and find it because it fits here. I will post it right below. Meanwhile welcome to you. I know with all my heart how you are suffering. It does get better. I can recover myself now. My son left yesterday, a property I own. I made him leave. He is bitter and rejecting. He blames me for everything. Helping him never works.. I haven't been able to stop. I love him. I keep believing there is a chance. But the thing is, I have no control over his "chances." Only he does. [/QUOTE]
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